Not Many Dead

"Not Many Dead" is a hilarious compendium of stunning and earth-shattering pieces of genuine non-news. It is quite remarkable how often even national newspapers feel obliged to pass on the most boring and banal information about nothing significant. Sometimes, it is the endless diet of news about celebrities, in which the minutest fact is deemed worthy of interest. Sometimes - as in the theft of two packets of peanuts from a building site in Dewsbury - the news item says something about the prevalence of crime in sleepy areas. And sometimes, as in the BBC website's revelation that "people could save money by switching off electrical devices", the non-news says a great deal about the redundancy of many statistical surveys. From Lech Walesa shaving off his moustache to the bending of a Skoda's windscreen wiper in Brightlingsea, here is the ultimate collection of heartstopping and world-changing news.