Chapter 1: Introduction

Thanks for picking up this book or starting to read it on your e-reader. Each chapter starts with a summary of what's covered so that you can quickly go to the areas that are most relevant for you. This first chapter provides the context to help you get the most out of reading this book, specifically it covers:

• Who is this book aimed at?
• Why is this important?
• Why have I written this book?
• How is this book structured?
• Types of support.

Who is this book aimed at?

For many people, returning to work after maternity, paternity or adoption leave is one of the biggest life changes they will face. Although you have hopefully experienced great joy upon becoming a parent and have a sense of excitement about returning to work, the transition from being a working professional, to a stay-at-home parent, to then a working parent, can feel like a significant challenge. You may be feeling guilty about leaving your baby, concerned about getting up to speed with changes at work or worried about dealing with expectations and assumptions from others. This book aims to provide practical, evidence-based help for what you can do as a returning parent to support yourself through this transition, with a series of reflective questions to consider, exercises, and thoughts on conversations to have with your line manager.

The return from parental leave is a shared responsibility, so as well as exploring how as a returning parent you can support yourself, this book provides guidance for managers on how to best support those returning from parental leave. As a manager you probably have great intentions when it comes to managing returning parents, however, you may lack the awareness, strategies or time to effectively manage this tricky transition on returning to work. This book provides practical strategies and checklists for you to support parental returners for a smoother transition, whilst the numerous quotes and case studies should provide an increased awareness of the variety of experiences for those returning as working parents.

This book is primarily aimed at working professionals and their managers, those who are looking to manage their career alongside being a parent. If you view your work more as a job rather than a career, there are still lots of techniques and tips within the book that you can put into practice, however, some of the sections on managing your career are likely to be less relevant.

Although this book could have been called "Returning successfully" or "Returning productively" the emphasis is on "Returning well" so that in conjunction with managing your career, or as a manager helping your returner manage their career and return successfully, the guidance here is also aimed at managing well-being for working parents. For each stage of the journey for you as a working parent, there are strategies for managing both your career and your well-being, whether that's how to effectively prepare for parental leave, setting up for your return to work, or how to make a successful transition when you are back in the workplace.

Much of the research, case studies and further resources shared throughout this book are UK-based, however, there are numerous examples drawn from other countries and the learnings can be applied if you're a returning parent or supporting manager from a different location. Similarly, although more of the research and experience in this field is connected with those taking maternity leave, families come in all shapes and sizes, so research and guidance is included to take account of the broad range of ways you can return as a working parent, including coming back from adoption leave, or returning after extended paternity leave. Throughout this book it refers to "parental leave" to cover maternity, paternity and adoption leave, unless the research is focused on a specific area.

Why is this important?

Returning to work after taking parental leave is hard - often it can be very hard. As you might expect, research shows that returning to work after maternity leave is challenging, with impacts on well-being for working mothers and increased employee turnover causing difficulties for organisations.1 Changes and progress are happening, but slowly and we still have a way to go.

The importance of both encouraging and enabling mothers to return to the workforce, and facilitating fathers taking parental leave, has been recognised by successive UK governments with a stream of legislation aimed at increasing the benefits, rights and choices for parents. For example, changes introduced through the Work and Families Act 2006, the Equality Act 2010 and the Children and Families Act 2014 have made it easier for women to both spend more time on maternity leave and to stay in contact whilst off, with the introduction of Keeping in Touch (KIT) days. The ability to take Shared Parental Leave (SPL), in place since April 2015, can give you the flexibility to share up to 50 weeks leave during a baby's first year, providing benefits for both mums and dads. In the UK there has also been a greater focus on flexibility, which has brought benefits for both parents and non-parents, including the right to ask for flexible working from the start of employment.

Organisations are also increasingly recognising the importance of encouraging and keeping mothers in the workforce and developing family-friendly policies and support for both mothers and fathers. These policies and support can help maintain well-being and minimize the financial and disruptive impact of employee turnover.

This may sound like good news and these changes from both government and organisations are having an impact. On the positive side there has been a shift in workplace demographics, with more mothers now in employment. ONS data2 shows that the employment rate for mothers in 2021 was 76% an increase of 7% since 2013, whilst research3 suggests that over 80% of UK professional women return to work after maternity leave, taking an average of nine months leave.

However, studies4 indicate that despite more legislated benefits and workplace policies, progress in supporting maternity returners and working parents is still lacking, we have a way to go. For example, the UK is viewed as offering limited maternity support compared to other European countries, particularly Scandinavia5, whilst mandatory paid maternity leave doesn't exist in the U.S. the only one of the OECD countries not to do so.

In addition, despite the introduction of Shared Parental Leave (SPL) in the UK, research6 indicates that only 1-2% of eligible fathers take advantage of this policy and share parental leave during the baby's first year. This research also shows that dads who do take SPL not only face similar challenges to returning mothers, but also additional hurdles such as going against gendered expectations of who takes time off for parental leave, and lacking the same support as returning mothers. So, although this legislation may look like a step in the right direction, in reality it's not having a big impact on reducing the challenges for new working parents.

Why have I written this book?

So, if we recognise the importance of supporting returning parents, what are the benefits of a new book in this area? Although there are a few books looking at how to transition to working parenthood, there have been a lot of recent changes in how we work, both as a result of the legislation mentioned above, but also changes to our working patterns, such as increased homeworking. Previous literature has mainly focused on guidance for returning mothers and doesn't take into consideration the small but growing body of fathers taking shared parental leave; there is also a lack of guidance for the manager or organisation supporting the return to work. This book takes a different angle, considering it a shared responsibility - by understanding where the manager is coming from as well as understanding the returner's position, this book aims to help both manage the successful transition to working parenthood.

When I returned from maternity leave for the first time in 2004, back to my role as an executive coach and consultant, I don't think I fully understood how best to support myself. Although I read widely whilst I was pregnant and on maternity leave, I didn't ever find a book that really helped me think through how to return. I hadn't realised at the time just how supportive my manager Jane was. She showed a deep understanding of the types of challenges I was experiencing and how best to support me. However, during my many years of working as a coach with parental returners and their managers, and also my organisational psychology research with maternity returners7, I know there can be wide variations in the levels of support from managers. Any lack of managerial support is often through being time-poor or unwittingly not fully understanding the challenges of the return from parental leave. There can also be a real lack of guidance to help managers.

This book is based on my 25+ years of working as a coach and also my organisational psychology research and expertise - aiming to provide practical support backed up by evidence-based research. Returning parents often talk about how it's helpful to realise that they are not alone and to understand the experiences of others who are going through a similar transition to a professional working parent. Dotted throughout this book are quotes...