Summary of Contents
Chapter 1-Ending a Dysfunctional Marriage With a Functional Divorce 1
Chapter 2-Divorce Fact-Checking 33
Chapter 3-Divorce Pearls and Perils: Secrets of Saving Money and Avoiding Mistakes 41
Chapter 4-Choosing the Right Divorce Lawyer For You 55
Chapter 5-Alternative Dispute Resolution: Saving Time, Money, and Your Sanity 75
Chapter 6-Using Financial Planners, Coaches, and Other Non-Lawyer Professionals 91
Chapter 7-Embracing the Tiger: How to Work With, and Spend Less on Lawyers 101
Chapter 8-Preparing and Analyzing Financial Disclosure Statements 123
Chapter 9-Taking Advantage of Divorce Tax Rules 139
Chapter 10-Providing for the Custody, Care and Comfort of Your Children 149
Chapter 11-Understanding Child Support 181
Chapter 12-Understanding Spousal Support 195
Chapter 13-Understanding Property Distribution 223
Chapter 14-Negotiating Your Divorce Successfully 253
Chapter 15-Scared Witless to Star Witness: A Testimony Primer 277
Chapter 16-Same-Sex Marriage and Divorce 293
Chapter 17-Your Divorce Afterlife 299
Chapter 18-More Divorce Resources 307
Appendices
Appendix 1: Statutory Criteria Summary 317
Appendix 2: Initial Consultation Checklist 319
Appendix 3: Children's Bill Of Rights When Parents Are Not Together . . . 321
Appendix 4: Negotiation Chart 322
Appendix 5: Sample Separation Agreement 324
Index 341vii
Contents
Dedication iii
Acknowledgments iv
Getting the Most Out of This Book xvii
Why I Worry About Your Divorce xvii
What's In This Book? xviii
What's in a List? xviii
What's So Funny About Divorce? (Nothing.) xx
Speaking of Your Children . . . xxi
Break-Upportunities xxii
Chapter 1: Ending a Dysfunctional Marriage With a Functional Divorce 1
The Functional Divorce 1
Deciding When to File 2
Filing Now 2
Filing Later 3
Alternatives to Divorce 3
Residence Requirements 4
Parenting During Divorce 5
The 10 Steps to a Functional Divorce 6
Obtaining Professional Advice 6
Why Is There So Much Bad Advice Out There? 8
Protecting Yourself With Automatic Restraining Orders 9
Protecting Yourself From Violence 10
Thinking About Your Divorce Goals 11
Deciding on Your Divorce Goals 16
Locating Key Documents 17
Financial Documents You May Need 18
Non-Financial Documents 20
Beginning to Plan For the Future 21
Creating a Paper Trail to Success 21
Educating Yourself About Divorce 22
Universal Divorce Principles 22
Basic Family Law Principles 22
Where State Divorce Law Comes From 23
Learning About Divorce in Your State 24
Divorce Procedure: The Steps to Your Divorce 25
What to Expect at Your Uncontested Hearing 28viii
Caring For Your Children 30
Caring For Yourself 31
Chapter 2: Divorce Fact-Checking 33
Separating the Wheat From the Cow Chips 33
Divorce BS and Semi-BS 33
Divorce BT (Basic Truths) 39
Chapter 3: Divorce Pearls and Perils: Secrets of Saving Money and Avoiding Mistakes 41
Find the Quality Lawyer Bargain Table! 41
When More Can Be Less: Learn About "Effective Billing Rates" 42
Discover the Secret Fount of Family Law Knowledge 42
Learn the Witness's Magic W
