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Shaping Your Journey in Tech

We need to accept that we won't always make the right decisions, that we'll screw up royally sometimes-understanding that failure is not the opposite of success, it's part of success.

-Arianna Huffington

Have you ever been asked, "Where do you see yourself in five years?" It's a classic career question that can feel both exciting and intimidating. For some, the answer comes naturally, filled with ambition and clarity. But for others, the question can spark a swirl of possibilities and even uncertainty. Maybe you're thriving in your role yet still feel the tug of something more. Or perhaps you're at a crossroads, wondering if the path you're on will lead to the impact you want to make.

The goal of this chapter is to explore practical techniques and tools for shaping a distinct and fulfilling career in technology. We'll delve into building self-awareness, aligning your career with your core values, setting and reassessing your goals, and preparing for those pivotal moments that can redefine your path.

Building Self-Awareness and Career Identity

From my personal experiences, in-depth interviews with global tech leaders and supporting studies,1 I've learned that self-awareness is a key pillar supporting a successful and meaningful career. In practice, self-awareness is built on connecting with your values, strengths, and motivations, and using these as a foundation to make intentional career moves.

Ivneet Kaur, EVP and Chief Information and Technology Officer at Sterling,2 emphasized the importance of self-awareness when I asked her about self-reflection in personal and professional growth. "I wish I had that self-awareness sooner," she said. "Finding what you're good at helps you find your purpose and move forward. It's important to believe in yourself and your abilities." Her words highlight the resilience and confidence that come with self-awareness, allowing us to navigate challenges with grace.

Kaur shared how yoga has played a crucial role in boosting her self-awareness and leadership style. She mentioned, "Practices like understanding different perspectives, seeking to understand before being understood, and staying calm in difficult situations without reacting impulsively have been invaluable." This insight emphasizes the continuous journey of self-awareness and its significant impact on personal growth and leadership.

So, how do you cultivate self-awareness? Start with a practice that feels right for you-it could be journaling, meditation, engaging in mindful listening, practicing gratitude, exploring creative activities, or something else.

For me, self-awareness started when I began taking time to reflect. I kept a journal, jotting down my thoughts, feelings, and reactions to different experiences at work. Using apps like Day One or the Five Minute Journal, which allow you to capture moods and specific reflections, made it easy to turn this into a sustainable habit. Over time, this practice helped me see patterns-what work genuinely excited me and what left me feeling drained.

Examples:

• I spent most of the day updating spreadsheets and handling administrative tasks. Found myself feeling drained and checking the clock often. Administrative work seems to sap my energy. I need an assistant urgently!
• I gave a presentation at a conference. Was nervous beforehand but received positive feedback afterward. Felt a strong sense of accomplishment and realized I enjoy public speaking more than I thought. I should do it more often!

Another powerful way I built self-awareness was by seeking feedback from others. I started asking colleagues and mentors for honest insights about my strengths and areas where I could grow. If asking directly feels awkward or a bit uncomfortable, consider using a written format. Tools like Google Forms, Typeform, or SurveyMonkey allow you to collect structured, anonymous feedback.

This feedback acted like an external mirror-revealing qualities I had overlooked, highlighting skills others valued in me that I hadn't fully recognized, and pointing out areas for improvement I wasn't aware of. Though sometimes hard to hear, these insights were invaluable, giving me a fresh perspective on myself as a leader.

Mindfulness became an unexpected ally for me. Setting aside just a few minutes each day for meditation helped me tune into my thoughts and feelings. For you, it might be taking a walk in nature, practicing deep-breathing exercises, or mindful eating-whatever helps you connect with the present moment. According to a study3 by Harvard researchers, mindfulness practice can actually change brain structures associated with learning, memory, and emotional regulation. The American Psychological Association4 also notes that mindfulness meditation reduces stress and improves attention. Apps like Serenity, Headspace, or Calm can help you create a habit through a guided process. Mindfulness doesn't mean finding answers right away; instead, it gives you the space to listen to your inner voice without distraction. Simple but consistent practices like mindful listening during meetings and taking intentional pauses between tasks or back-to-back meetings can help clear your mind.

I also started incorporating a simple gratitude practice into my daily routine. Before going to sleep, I'd ask myself, "What am I grateful for today?" I'd take a moment to acknowledge three things I was thankful for that day-a successful product launch, a breakthrough in a challenging project, a supportive conversation with a colleague, sharing a meal with family, enjoying a beautiful sunset, or even appreciating a moment of laughter with friends.

Self-awareness might sound abstract, but it's a deeply practical foundation for building a career that feels genuine. It's what allows us to make intentional decisions that reflect our true identity rather than conforming to an external idea of "success." When we know our strengths, values, and motivations, we're better equipped to seek out opportunities that resonate with who we are. We're able to create a career path that doesn't just meet expectations but feels meaningful and aligned.

An ancient proverb says: "If you don't have time to meditate for an hour each day, then you should meditate for two." In modern terms, this means that the busier we are, the more we benefit from moments of pause and introspection. Blocking off time to cultivate mindfulness and engage in self-reflective activities can provide the perspective needed to gain clarity.

Aligning Personal Values with Career Decisions

Years ago, I reached a point where I had to ask myself, "Am I doing this because it's what I'm good at, or because it's what I love?" I'd been exploring various directions, taking on roles and projects that challenged me. But it wasn't until I aligned my work with my core values-inclusion, empowerment, and impact-that I found a deeper sense of fulfillment. My career shifted from being a checklist of milestones to a path that truly reflected who I am and the difference I want to make.

Seeing the lack of representation and opportunities for women in tech and leadership, I felt a strong urge to take action, leading to creating WomenTech Network. Inclusion meant creating spaces where everyone, regardless of gender, could feel welcomed and valued. Empowerment was about providing the tools and support women needed to thrive in a male-dominated field. Impact drove me to strive for meaningful change that would resonate beyond individual careers and influence the industry as a whole.

In an interview, Aysha Khan, CISO and CIO of Treasure Data,5 shared her reflections on values with me. She said, "I have absolute clarity about my life, who I am, and what I want to be. I know why I'm here on this planet in this space and time. I know my mission. My top three values are connections, impact, and inner peace. I've done a lot of self-reflection and spent time asking myself these questions. Connections: Family, meaningful conversations, and soulful relationships. Impact: I am not doing it for a paycheck; I am doing it to make an impact. Inner Peace: I believe in inner peace."

If you were to list your core values right now, what would they be? It might seem like an abstract exercise but identifying what you genuinely care about can be one of the most powerful tools for aligning your career. For me, understanding my core values didn't happen overnight, and it took a few missteps to uncover what truly drives me. But once I did, these values became a compass for my decisions, giving my career new direction and meaning.

Inspired by Brené Brown's "Dare to Lead,"6 I began to explore and reassess my own values more intentionally. I started by writing down all the values that resonated with me-anything that felt important. Then I reflected and narrowed down the list, circling those that spoke to me most and challenging myself to pick the top two or three. I asked myself, "Which values are essential to who I am?" Defining how these values manifest in daily life made them more tangible. For example, if courage was a core value, it might involve speaking up in meetings or taking on challenging projects. If compassion was important, it could mean actively listening or offering...