Diary of a Semi-Functional Adult

A hilariously honest novel about pretending to have your life together when it's clearly falling apart.

Emily Bennett has perfected the art of looking like she has it all together. Steady job? Check. Apartment with actual furniture? Check. A houseplant named Herbert that's somehow still alive? Check.

But behind her carefully crafted façade, Emily is drowning. Between passive-aggressive emails from Brenda in accounting, a boss who uses the phrase 'crushing our goals' unironically, and a mother who thinks grandchildren 'don't just appear,' Emily's grip on sanity is slipping fast.

When a public meltdown at work forces her into therapy, Emily reluctantly begins journaling her thoughts, documenting her journey from chaos to...slightly more manageable chaos. Through panic attacks in meeting rooms, failed attempts at self-care, and the occasional flash of clarity, Emily discovers that maybe-just maybe-the secret to being a functional adult isn't having it all figured out, but learning to embrace the beautiful mess of reality.

With razor-sharp wit and painful honesty, Diary of a Semi-Functional Adult captures the millennial experience of burnout, boundaries, and finding your way back to yourself when life has other plans. This refreshingly candid novel speaks to anyone who's ever felt overwhelmed by adulthood, questioned their life choices at 3 AM, or hidden in a bathroom stall to avoid their responsibilities.

A perfect read for those navigating the chaos of modern life who need a reminder that they're not alone in the struggle-and that sometimes, just surviving is its own kind of success.