CHAPTER 1
Chaos Refines Us

I have refined you, but not as silver is refined.

Rather, I have refined you in the furnace of suffering.

Isaiah 48:10

Is My Situation Worse?

Is chaos today worse than ever? We are all tempted to think so, but I believe this is the wrong question since every generation faces its own unique chaos. The common characteristic of chaos is that it is ever present for all generations, but its characteristics are unique to the time in which it unfolds.

I doubt those who lived through the plague that killed half the population of Europe or those whose homeland has been bombed into oblivion in a war would say our time is worse.

A better question is, what are you facing now, and how will you overcome it? One health care client I work with has the normal challenges of a highly demanding industry. But because of COVID, they have been stretched to the limit of human endurance in their ability to meet people's needs. They struggle with their own sickness, exhaustion, and discouragement. For them, overcoming this particular chaos is the only question that matters at this moment.

The good news is that we have been created for a purpose, and even chaos exists for a purpose. And these two purposes are interrelated.

For those earlier in your career, this connection is not as easy to see. With the benefit of decades in the business world, I am going to share the parts of my journey that helped me see my purpose and the role of chaos in it.

Let's start with a question I asked myself 40 years ago that kicked off the lifelong adventure that has led to this book.

The Question that Started It All

For as long as I can remember, my life has been a quest to identify and solve problems. Before college, this drive manifested itself in organizing and building things. Born before the microcomputer era, my brother and I were always taking apart go-kart engines and rebuilding them. We grew up on a farm, and there was never any shortage of opportunities for exploration.

In college, I gravitated toward business systems analysis-gathering information and defining solutions. In graduate school, I focused on change management. At the time, I was employed by the university as a systems analyst in the business office.

Like any first-time employee, there was a lot I needed to learn just to do my job. But from a career development perspective, observing how work got done around me was more interesting than my work. How decisions were made, how organizations were structured, people's behavior, the impact of technologies-it was an analyst's dream, a fertile learning environment. The only downside was that I didn't have enough time to digest it all.

After a few years, one human behavior question became central to my observations. The initial version of the question was, "Why do people, including me, say one thing but do another?"

Why do people, including me, say one thing but do another?

Why did I constantly say to myself I wanted one thing but did something else? It seemed like I had a split personality, and I really didn't like it.

For example, people who were vocal about being overwhelmed with too many projects would continue to take on more. Individuals who recognized they talked too much in meetings would keep talking. Or those who would lose their temper couldn't seem to stop, although declaring loudly they wanted to.

Think about your own New Year's resolutions, and you get the picture.

None of these examples are a big deal. But it was the pervasiveness of this pattern that got my attention. I realized I had the same behavior. Why did I constantly say to myself I wanted one thing but did something else? It seemed like I had a split personality, and I didn't like it.

I didn't realize it at the time, but this kind of human behavior underlies one type of chaos that we will discuss in Chapter 3 called "the chaos within."

After a while, my question broadened from contradictory behavior to a more general question: "Why do humans behave the way they do?" Who knew that trying to answer this question would turn into a lifelong pursuit?

Before exploring how I got the answer to my question, a heads-up regarding worldviews.

Differing Worldviews

If you are unsure or even wary of a biblical view of leadership, please consider this. The people I learn the most from are those who think differently from me.

If you are unsure or even wary of a biblical view of leadership, please consider this. The people I learn the most from are those who think differently than I do.

I particularly admire people who know what they believe and act on those beliefs. I don't tell other people what to believe; I simply share what I have learned, hoping it will help people in their pursuit of truth.

Most of us can rally around the pursuit of truth. If we are relentless, we will eventually find it.

Most of us can rally around the pursuit of truth. If we are relentless, we will eventually find it. I enjoy being in the presence of truth seekers!

I hope, regardless of your worldview, that you find in me someone who has devoted a lifetime trying to understand what I believe and act accordingly. It is a journey of trial and error. If that sounds interesting, read on!

Back to the question of human behavior.

Seeking Answers

As I sought answers, I started doing research. I read books on psychology, neuroscience, self-help disciplines, business autobiographies, philosophy, world religions, organizational development-you name it, I read it.

In my reading, I learned that C.S. Lewis noticed this same human behavior issue decades before I did and framed the issue more eloquently. He observed:

First, that human beings, all over the earth, have this curious idea that they ought to behave in a certain way, and cannot really get rid of it. Second, that they do not in fact behave that way. They know the Law of Nature; they break it. These facts are the foundation of all clear thinking about ourselves and the universe we live in.

Lewis, C.S. Mere Christianity (C.S. Lewis Signature Classics), p. 8. HarperCollins. Kindle Edition.

I was struck by Lewis's opinion that these observations (and the answer to the questions they implied) were the foundation of all clear thinking about everything. A pretty big premise that only fed my pursuit.

As a last resort, I turned to the Bible and found explanations that resonated. I grew up in a community where people went to church on Sunday, and though our family attended every week, active faith was not part of our family life. We didn't talk about God, biblical truth, or how to apply it. My parents had a quiet faith but were of the Great Depression generation and were pretty quiet about deeper meaning topics. I had read the Bible in high school, but it seemed fragmented and hard to understand.

This time I was reading with a specific question in mind and saw insights on our purpose, design, and behavior that differed from all the other sources I was reading.

But in this grand "experiment," a conflict between our desires and reason emerged.

The biblical premise is that God created us to be stewards of the earth and do so in relation to Him and each other. And our design was optimized for that purpose. But in this grand "experiment," a conflict between our desires and reason emerged and created misalignments within ourselves, with each other, and with God. These misalignments are the root of our unpredictable behaviors.

This explanation fits with what I had been observing about myself and others. I had what the Bible calls a "metanoia" experience-a deep spiritual change in heart and mind about who I am and why I am here. From that point forward, the biblical framework became increasingly infused into every aspect of my life.

Science and Beyond

You can think of the Bible as a user's manual explaining why we are here and how we are designed and providing wisdom for life. The Bible states that creation itself reveals the truth about God, so I am a huge fan of scientific discovery, as you will see in later chapters.

But I also recognize there are limits to science. Science can't contribute beyond what can be detected or measured with instruments. For example, science can't answer what happened before the beginning or what love is. The Bible reveals what science cannot: the eternal spiritual dimension of life and the unseen and immeasurable relationship with God and the meaning of life.

This book integrates business and biblical principles for leading yourself and others. And it explores the role of human desire in everything we do and how to manage it. But this book cannot change your desires. I can share principles and insights, but the desire to believe them or apply them comes from within you.

As we will explore later, human desire is the only thing in the universe that is not subject to the laws of physics. At its deepest level, changing human desire is a spiritual topic best explored in a one-on-one interaction with a trusted spiritual advisor. I advocate an advisor who guides you into the teaching and person of Jesus, but only you can decide to explore that path. (Trust me, there is much good news in that journey...