Chapter 3
Your Routine Matters

The key to a great day begins the night before. When I realized this, I devised a system centered on planning your day. PREPARE and MARVEL are the acronyms for it. These two acronyms simplify your daily routines. It started as an experiment on myself that turned into research, conversations, and interviews, which then helped me create the two acronyms. I have a whole book about this routine, but I condensed it into a chapter so you can apply this to your life today.

PREPARE and MARVEL are the evening and morning routines that also include a set of questions that will make you mindful and aware of the important aspects of your life.

We will start with the PREPARE portion first.

The formula for PREPARE is easy to remember: Plan, Review, Exercise, Practice, Affirmations, Reflect, and Embrace. This method will enhance your nightly rituals while also raising your awareness of your thoughts and behaviors throughout the day. It will also include exercises to protect your abilities, skills, and ambitions from digital distractions and minor diversions, allowing your life to unfold from the inside out, changing how people interact with you.

The wonderful thing about routines is that we all have them. For the majority of us, it's something we ignore; we wake up and let the day unfold as we pick up our devices and get going. What I've noticed is that successful people are much more deliberate in their work. They organize their actions around what they consider to be important, and this becomes a habit. The idea of success differs from person to person, so those automatic routines gravitate toward different things depending on the person. Because not everyone is fortunate enough to have routines that lead to a more fruitful life and purposeful existence, I've taken the time to identify the critical components of these routines and break them down so you can incorporate them into your daily process.

PREPARE

It starts at any time you want it to begin in the evening, so you can transition into being present at home for yourself and, if you have a family, for your family.

• P: Plan. We all know we should do it, but not everyone takes the time to adequately plan for the next day. This is when you spend a few minutes evaluating the events of the day and your priorities for the day ahead to ensure you don't forget anything important. Simple.
• R: Review. Days fly by so quickly and we are bombarded with so much information that it is natural to overlook something. This is the time to review your tasks, priorities, notes, schedule, email, voicemail, and texts to determine if you missed anything that needs to be addressed the following day. This review phase is designed to function as a catch-all to ensure that no minor things are overlooked.
• E: Exercise: This section can be a full-fledged exercise session for you, or you can do what I do. I do some pushups and sit-ups for two or three minutes, but it does not replace my workout period. I do a full workout in the middle of the day, so this is just something I do at the end of the day to get the blood pumping. It's a fact that the mind is linked to the body, and motion creates emotion, so jump in and finish it!
• P: Practice gratitude: This might vary greatly from person to person. The cycle is completed by ending the day with time to reflect on what you are grateful for. It sets the tone for a day filled with gratitude for the people in your life who have had a positive influence on you. Ending the day with gratitude prepares you for a restful night's sleep and teaches you to live with humility. Science clearly shows that practicing gratitude can and does relieve stress, anxiety, and depression and is beneficial to the mind and body.
• A: Affirmations: Yes, these are excellent for the evenings. As I wind down in the evening, I use a different set of affirmations, but you can use the same ones you use in the morning. The idea is to shape yourself into the person you want to be by using the words you use every day. The repeated process causes a subconscious reaction in your mind, helping you to become more conscious of your actions and ideas. It all comes down to your reticular activating system.
• R: Reflect: This one has been a lot of fun. This one alone has helped me be more appreciative of my day and the events that transpired. Additionally, it aided me in mentally navigating my day and ensuring that I performed as desired. This is the time to reflect on your day to see how you interacted with others and how you talked to yourself throughout the day. Awareness creates better interaction with those around you. Do not skip this stage since it will teach you a lot about yourself and those you surround yourself with.
• E: Embrace: I've always struggled with this one since I feel like I'm always "on." I'm constantly thinking about the future of Lab Coat Agents, A Brilliant Tribe, Tristan and Associates, Brilliant Thoughts, and my other businesses. At this time, I entirely succumb to the evening and stop! I accept that the day has come to an end and that I have done everything I can. Embracing the evening allows me to accept that I will be spending the evening with my family and friends. I still battle with this from time to time and check my email or notes from earlier in the day, but I catch myself and put things away. Embracing the evening completely will help you calm your mind in preparation for the next day's engagement.

That's it in a super concise process. You can choose to modify the stages as you like or follow them just like I have them. The idea behind the routine is to control what you focus on daily as you wrap up the day so that you are preparing to have an amazing day ahead.

MARVEL

This one starts when you wake up, but I'm not telling you to wake up at 4 a.m. or even 5 a.m. I just want you to wake up with enough time to fit this in. If it's 30 minutes before your normal time, then that's what you need to do. Listen, change takes effort, so don't complain about what you need to do. Just follow the routine and let the process elevate you.

• M: Meditation (mediation/prayer or both): I begin with this one because it is critical to begin each day with a clear mind and focused thoughts. If you choose to meditate, I recommend beginning with the simple act of sitting up straight and breathing in and out, focusing solely on your breathing. Additionally, I would recommend that you use an app such as Calm to guide you through the meditation process. The research on learning how to focus is immense and wide and will change your life drastically for the better.
• A: Affirmation (mantra, incantations, or all three): The words you use to speak to yourself are significant, which is why this section is so important. I use affirmations to motivate myself to work on areas where I want to improve. Self, family, leadership, and so forth. I usually read through these in about two minutes.
• R: Record: I've been journaling consistently since 2011, and it truly helps me clear my mind by organizing my thoughts and reflecting on the events of the previous day. I usually jot down what I did the previous day and keep my journal in an app called DayOne. Typically, I spend around three minutes on this. You can record your voice, a video, type it, write it, or just add pictures.
• V: Visualize: I've shaped this section over the years into something I love. For years, I struggled with this one because everything I read and discovered online about visualizing felt wrong for me. I use this time to visualize the type of person, parent, leader, or anything else I aspire to be and mentally walk through the steps necessary to get there. I typically spend approximately five minutes on this part. During the visualization process, I go through three thoughts:
  • Self: mind, body, spirit, emotions;
  • Family: spouse, kids, siblings, parents; friends
  • Business.

    When I go through these processes, I allow my subconscious to inform me of which one I am most lacking in. I then immediately visualize two things:

  • What can I do today to work on this?
  • Where do I want to be three months from now with this?

    Although this process can be completed in as little as five minutes, it can also take much longer.

• E: Exercise: I've simplified this section for you. You can either use this time to exercise in the morning or do a small amount of exercise during this time. Because I exercise in the middle of the day to accommodate my schedule, this morning's session consists of two quick sets of pushups, totaling approximately 80 pushups. I occasionally perform jumping jacks as well, but only briefly to pump myself up and get my mind and body moving in unison. A few of my friends do burpees, but I'm not that crazy.
• L: Learn: Usually, I use this time to read a book. If I find myself with only three to five minutes, I open my favorite book, The Daily Stoic, and read a brief excerpt. If I have 15-30 minutes to spare, I usually pick up the book I'm currently reading and dive in. Additionally, you can take a few minutes to listen to a podcast, a webinar, or watch a brief inspirational video on YouTube, Masterclass, or TED. I usually allot about 20 minutes for this section.

The...