Perspective Drifts Like a Log on a River

Book Worm
My friend really doesn't read books. He just wants people to think that. What he actually
does is buy tomes with pithy titles to dazzle people with his sophistication. He
then asks if they'd like to read them when he's done. If they say yes-and they usually do,
because they want to look smart, too-he goes through the books and dog-ears them at
100 page intervals to give the impression he's read them with sustained interest.

Hypergraphiacosis
I told my friends that for years I haven't been able to stop writing. Morning, noon, and
night words pour out of me. That's wonderful, they said. You must have many books to
your credit by now. I said no. That, in fact, I didn't have anything that constituted a full
text. They were surprised and asked why. I answered that while the words keep flowing
from my brain unabated they just don't seem to be able to assemble themselves into a
coherent whole.