About the Author v 1 The Troll under the Bridge 1
2 Apologies 7
3 Motivation 13
4 Poetry in my Helmet 19
5 The Texas Shakedown 23
6 Lake Michigan, You're It 29
7 Lost 35
8 A Motorcycle with No Name 41
9 Guinness World Record 47
10 Tropical Storm Bill 53
11 Haiku 59
12 Things You'll Need 63
13 Roasted in Texas 69
14 Debit Cards and Truth or Consequences 73
15 The Cabin 77
16 Saved on Wolf Creek Pass 83
17 000,000 89
18 Dear Sons 95
19 Planet HD219134b 99
20 Zs at Cuyamaca Rancho 103
21 A World Record Decision 107
22 Lance, Lenora, and Robert 113
23 Bumpy Earth 119
24 Relatives and Friends I Hadn't Met 125
25 Haiku Encore 131
26 Sam from Coeur d' Alene 135
27 Typical Day 139
28 Spring 145
29 Portland to Key West 149
30 Florida State Trooper 155
31 Sand between My Toes 159
32 Key Lime Pie 163
33 Fuzzygalore and Other Friends 167
34 Posting on Social Media 173
35 New Hampshire is No Texas 179
36 Dodging Moose and Lobster Rolls 185
37 Erie Canal 191
38 The Great Lakes and Former Students 197
39 Faith 203
40 The Stats 207
41 Crying in my Helmet 211
Epilogue 215
