
Get Laid or Die Trying
Description
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Before there were any books by Neil Strauss or Mystery, before there were pickup boot camps or DVD box sets, pickup existed as a loosely-knit "community" on Internet bulletin boards. There, would-be players shared their field reports, strategies, and results. They compared notes, exchanged critiques, and figured out a body of knowledge that defied everything men had ever been told about getting women?what has since come to be known as game.
The undisputed king of the field report was a player named "jlaix." This was the handle of Jeff Allen, who would go on to be a founding member of Real Social Dynamics with Tyler Durden and Papa, all of whom play major roles in Neil Strauss's The Game, the bestselling exposé of the world of pickup artists. In an arena founded on one-upmanship, Jeff Allen did it bigger and better than anyone. Get Laid or Die Trying presents in utterly shameless, hilarious, and graphic detail, Jeffy's gritty, 100 percent real, and jaw-droppingly astonishing feats of seduction, revealing exactly how one goes about:
• Attracting the girl you want by sleeping with all of her friends
• Getting into the pants of the hottest girl at the party?a total stranger?in less than thirty minutes
• Deflecting last-minute resistance with a single word
• Pulling a chick who is surrounded by ten jealous guys
• Cutting out enormous dudes that could easily pound you to a "fine red mist"
• Getting threesomes as your default extraction
• Having a stable so big you have to trim it down, and other "quality problems"
• Convincing a girl you just met that before you sleep with her, she must mow your lawn
Jeff's tactics produce superhuman results, yet he doesn't do anything you couldn't do?now that you've seen it done. The worst part? You could have been doing this your whole life.
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Content
- Cover
- Title Page
- Copyright Page
- Dedication
- Foreword
- Chapter 1: Xmas Eve 2000 A.D.
- Chapter 2: Demo Tape
- Chapter 3: Grenade Pin
- Chapter 4: Lakeside Blues
- Chapter 5: Thug Life
- Chapter 6: Fucking & Punching
- Chapter 7: Blauhaus
- Chapter 8: Oaktown Mack
- Chapter 9: Magic Trick
- Chapter 10: Journey
- Chapter 11: Rage Fuck
- Chapter 12: A Very Jlaix Halloween
- Chapter 12: Brainwash
- Chapter 13: Dollar Drinks
- Chapter 14: Christmastime at The El Rio
- Chapter 15: Trading Spaces with The Bachelor
- Chapter 16: Worst Night Ever
- Chapter 17: Take Me to The River
- Chapter 18: Warpig Surprise
- Chapter 19: Riot Game
- Chapter 20: Haye is For Horses
- Chapter 21: Gff
- Chapter 22: Twelve-Year-Old Gay Thieves
- Held at Gunpoint
- Chapter 23: Little Miss Twelve Gauge
- Chapter 24: Td and Papa at El Rio
- Chapter 25: Pickup Workshop
- Chapter 26: The Presumption of Respect
- Chapter 27: Sex with Giraffe
- Chapter 28: Jlaix Actually Cries
- Chapter 29: Get Back Giraffe? Don't Make me Laugh
- Chapter 30: Air Supply
- Chapter 31: Irc Chode Fucks Up The Program
- Chapter 32: Peace Train
- Chapter 33: Fool's Mate Eight
- Chapter 34: Hitting The Success Barrier
- Chapter 35: Jimmy Schwag
- Chapter 36: Jeff and The Giant Nazi
- Chapter 37: Math
- Chapter 38: Drunk at The Bizzle
- Chapter 39: Total Duck Mind-Fuck
- Chapter 40: Codeine, Amnesia
- Chapter 41: Her Shredded Soul
- Chapter 42: Fat Fuck
- Chapter 42: Bringing The Truth
- Chapter 43: Valentine's Day
- I
- Ultimate Framework
- Hairpullin'
- Apocalypse '04: The Chess Club Strikes Black
- Twenty-One-and-A-Halfed
- Fuck List
- Louisiana Bigtits
- Jeffy's First Stripper (Drugs Sold Separately)
- What Would Tyler Durden Do?
- The Return of The Jlaix
- Victory
- Full-Blown One-Itis
- Jeffy's First Threesome (Scotch Not Included)
- Ménage-À-Canuck-Stripper
- Poutine Dreams
- Another Whore Gets Fucked
- Club Jeffy
- Swindling Bitches Out of Their Dreams
- Ticking Time Bomb
- Hustler Honey, Eurotrash
- Dinner with Ex-Girlfriend
- Bro Date
- II
- Another Boring Threesome
- The Hour of Chrispy
- Discipline and Sharing
- Smashed Again
- Teen Duffer at The Taco Shop
- Cocaine Raps
- Dump Tina
- Bloody Murder
- Chessclub R.I.P.
- III
- Off Night
- Auld Lang Syne
- Double Vision
- I Wanna Know What Love is
- Soda Model
- Weirdness
- Transforming Into A Chick
- Rapport Challenge
- Fired
- Closure
- Power Exchange
- Chode Hell
- Coma
- Cliff Diving
- IV
- Tapas Y Discotecas
- Sex
- Barrio Gotico
- Butano
- Domingo Perezoso
- Mile-High Chav Lovin'
- Superstar
- Adios
- V
- Cabanas Copal
- Orange County
- Love
- Red Racer
- About Real Social Dynamics
- About The Author
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