Love Hacks

Introduction

Issue 1: “My Partner Doesn’t Listen to Me”

Fast-Food Communication

“I” Statements

Sounding Board vs.Feedback

Issue 2: “We Are Constantly Arguing!”

Time-Outs

Who Is More EmotionallyInvested?

Assuming Positive Intentions

Issue 3: “We Don’t Make Time for Each Other”

Date Nights andScheduling

Quick PartnerConnections

Exploring the Resistance

Issue 4: “We Don’t Have Sex Anymore”

Looking at Resentments

Sensate Focus Therapy

Setting the Scene

Issue 5: “I Don’t Feel in Love with My Partner Anymore”

The Continuum ofLong-Term Relationships

Love Letters

Understanding YourConnection Style

Issue 6: “I Do so Many More Chores!”

Chore Chart

Appreciating YourPartner

Becoming Teammates

Issue 7: “We Can’t Trust Each Other after Infidelity”

Starting the ForgivenessProcess

Grieving and RenewingYour Commitment

Understanding the Affairand Setting Boundaries

Issue 8: “We Are too Culturally Different”

Learning about Culture

Incorporating Traditions

Having Fun Experiencinga Partner’s Culture

Issue 9: “We Spend Money Differently”

Setting Financial Goals

Generating a Budget

Creating an EmotionalInventory

Issue 10: “My Partner or I Have an Addiction”

Understanding Addiction

Planning for Recovery

Identifying YourNegative Voice

Issue 11: “Things Are Different since We Had Kids”

Experiencing the Before

Setting Up for Success

Division of ChildResponsibilities

Issue 12: “I Don’t Feel Respected by My Partner”

BISECT: A Way to ShowRespect

Cognitive Distortions

Respect Initiatives

Issue 13: “Social Media Is Damaging OurRelationship”

Questionnaire on SocialMedia

Establishing SocialMedia Boundaries

Using the Mirror on Why

Issue 14: “We Want Different Things”

Determine Our Needs fromWants

Values Pie Chart andShared Dreams

The Game of Life 2.0

Issue 15: “There Is too Much Anger Between Us”

Uncovering the EmotionsBehind Anger

Perspectives to Let Go

Empathizing with OurPartner

Conclusion

Acknowledgments

Notes

About the Author