
What Killed Sally
Description
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The Green Tree Campers of America youth organization leads camping expeditions to educate their young-mostly city-raised members-in outdoor skills, and PSL Ranch in Central Texas is one of their favorite locations. Although this ranchland is beautiful and full of interesting wildlife, it can also be quite dangerous for the unprepared. Due to "a few" lethal incidents involving campers named Sally, PSL ranch hands created this informational safety guide to avert injury, maiming, or death for those camping in this remote Texas ranchland. "Why Sally? What did Sally ever do to you?" these questions are often asked of ranch hands by visitors or during interrogations by law enforcement officers following an incident. The simple answer is, "Why not Sally?" What Killed Sally is a hilarious, politically incorrect, and somewhat twisted collection of ways Sally meets her maker while camping on a remote Central Texas ranch. Fully illustrated, What Killed Sally provides information on each incident while including interesting and sometimes useless facts on the local wildlife, fauna, and inhabitants. There's even a bonus section with some scrumptious recipes that keep GTCA campers well-fed. Based on actual locations and the ranchers that manage the land, What Killed Sally provides all the information you'll need to survive the Central Texas outdoors should you decide to hike or camp in this desolate wilderness. Had Sally read this safety guide, it may have saved her life.
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Content
- Intro
- Prologue
- Introduction
- PSL Ranch Hands
- Death by Diamondback
- Mountain Lion Lunch
- Milkweed Is Not to Be Mistaken with Milk Thistle!
- Coyote Ugly
- Ancient Oaks: A Not-So-Subtle Squish
- A Stuffed Raccoon is a Safe Raccoon
- Are EpiPens Really Too Expensive: Bees and Wasps
- Bobcat-Not Your Average Pussycat
- Toadstools Are Not Mushrooms
- Signal Up High
- Jumping Rocks
- The Wash
- Hell, It's a Hailstorm!
- Lake Rohret Tragedy
- Bacteria-the Tiny Killer
- Cactuses Aren't Just Pretty Plants or Death by a Thousand Needles
- The Dancing Whitetails
- Wild Boars: A Feral Situation
- Skunk-A Smelly Situation
- Lightning or Death from Above!
- The Dorothy Effect (Tornado)
- Hunting Season: A Texas Pastime
- Dirty Feet: Death by Jamaican!
- Wildfire: As Fast as the Wind
- The Rapids-A Rare Event!
- Trespassing Means Open Season on Campers
- Flashflood: Why Do You Think the Cabin's on Stilts?
- Death by Archery or Robin Hood She Ain't!
- Dehydration Is Only Good for Fruit and Meat
- If You ain't Trained with a Gun, Don't Use It!
- Heatstroke: The Microwave Effect!
- The Brown Recluse, Black Widow, and Other Nasty Spiders
- Lyme Disease: The Dreaded Tick or Government Conspiracy?
- Openly Supporting Gun Control
- Hypothermia - A Winter Event
- Blue Wildebeest and Nilgai Blue Bull: They're Not Cattle
- Cattle: They Are Dumb Animals!
- Singing Southern Man on Karaoke Night at Uncle Weirdo's Tavern
- Skeeters by the Millions!
- Don't Worry - There Are No Bears or Wolves on PSL Ranch Yet!
- Epilogue
- Book a Camping Site at PSL Ranch
- PSL Recipes
- Jamaican Patois to English Translations
- Green Tree Campers of America Sponsors
- About Our Illustrator Sketch
- PSL Store Items www.whatkilledsally.com/store
- About the Author
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