Confronting Shame
How to Understand Your Shame and Gain Inner Freedom
Published on 21. April 2022
144 pages
978-1-83997-141-9 (ISBN)
Description
From the bestselling author of Highly Sensitive People in an Insensitive World
Shame might be far from the first thing that comes to mind when you think about what's causing your problems. Shame is hidden, and rarely something we talk about, but it can underlie challenges that we deal with on a daily basis, including anxiety, depression and low self-esteem.
This book will help you understand what shame is, how it arises and, in turn, how to overcome it. With exercises in each chapter, it provides tools to reflect on, confront and free yourself from shame. The book also includes a questionnaire to assess how much shame impacts you.
Be kind to yourself and rediscover your empathy for yourself with Confronting Shame.
Shame might be far from the first thing that comes to mind when you think about what's causing your problems. Shame is hidden, and rarely something we talk about, but it can underlie challenges that we deal with on a daily basis, including anxiety, depression and low self-esteem.
This book will help you understand what shame is, how it arises and, in turn, how to overcome it. With exercises in each chapter, it provides tools to reflect on, confront and free yourself from shame. The book also includes a questionnaire to assess how much shame impacts you.
Be kind to yourself and rediscover your empathy for yourself with Confronting Shame.
More details
Edition
Digital original
Language
English
Place of publication
London
United Kingdom
Edition type
Digital original
Illustrations
5 b&w diagrams
File size
1,10 MB
ISBN-13
978-1-83997-141-9 (9781839971419)
Copyright in bibliographic data and cover images is held by Nielsen Book Services Limited or by the publishers or by their respective licensors: all rights reserved.
Schweitzer Classification
Other editions
Additional editions
Book
04/2022
Jessica Kingsley Publishers
€14.00
Shipment within 3-4 weeks
Persons
Ilse Sand is a psychotherapist, public speaker and author of several self-help books. She specialises in counselling highly sensitive people. She is based in Denmark.
Content
- Cover
- Title Page
- Copyright
- Contents
- Introduction
- Part One: Understanding Shame
- 1. The Nature and Function of Shame
- The anxiety in shame
- You can be unaware of shame
- Situations that trigger shame
- The difference between shame and guilt
- A shame reaction is an alarm
- Shame is a social emotion
- Summary
- 2. Chronic Shame Arises from Inharmonious Interactions
- Self-esteem and sense of self
- Feeling truly seen
- A distorted mirror
- Attentive mirroring leads to inner support
- Lack of mirroring leads to an absence of self-support
- Summary
- 3. Shame Can Be a Reaction to a Hole in Your Sense of Self
- The fear of vanishing into a void
- Serious holes in our sense of self
- Lack of solid ground
- Summary
- 4. Shame Holds You Back
- A difficult conversation
- Summary
- 5. The False Self as a Defense against Shame
- Success strengthens the false self
- The fantastic, invincible false self
- Shame about longing for love
- The false self can't stand intimacy
- Anger and contempt as a defense against intimacy
- Get out of a fairy tale
- Down the mountain and back home
- Summary
- Part Two: Tools
- A vicious circle must be broken
- 6. Get to Know Yourself Better
- How you receive feedback
- Film yourself
- Experience yourself from the inside
- Get in touch with an even deeper level of yourself
- Go into psychotherapy or take a course in self-development
- Summary
- 7. Get Close to Your Shame
- Working on your inner scenes of shame strengthens your sense of self
- Shame is a relational emotion
- Be cautious and choose your listener with care
- Take small steps when anxiety looms
- Summary
- 8. Give Thought to Whom You Spend Your Time With
- Your childhood family
- Find good models
- Direct your attention to the healthy inner voices
- Summary
- 9. Establish Friendly Contact with Yourself
- It's not you there is something wrong with
- Don't obey anxiety
- From shame to guilt
- Rediscover empathy with yourself
- Write to yourself in a loving manner
- Through sorrow and on to self-compassion
- Summary
- Afterword
- Let emptiness bloom
- Are You Hampered By Shame? Test Yourself
- Take the test with a pinch of salt
- To those of you who get a low score
- Advice to those who get a high score
- Find the right helper
- An enormous opportunity for growth
- Bibliography
- Acknowledgments
- About the Author
- Of related interest
