Chapter 1
Act Personally, But Think Institutionally
Develop Your Network Beyond Your Organization

Richard Parsons was born into a poor neighborhood in Brooklyn and did not have any “connections.” But he went on to become the chairman of Citigroup, the twelfth-ranked company on the Fortune 500 list. This is the so-called American Dream, the ability to come from nothing and work your way to the top of the food chain. There are many ways to “make it,” but they all require networks, something Parsons was lacking at the beginning of his career. But all it took was one connection to change his life.

While Parsons attended Albany Law School, he interned with the New York state legislature and drew the attention of the governor's office. They extended him an offer, and Parsons began working for the man who would eventually shape his entire career: Governor Nelson Rockefeller. Parsons and Rockefeller hit it off; Parsons said they had “good chemistry”:

Eventually, Parsons practiced law, and Rockefeller frequently referred clients to him. Parsons recalled that when Forbes magazine first published its list of the 400 richest Americans, 5 of the top 10 were his personal clients: “It was all because either they were people that I'd been introduced to by the governor, or who basically said, ‘Well, I've heard you're a good lawyer. If you can represent the Rockefellers, you can certainly represent me.’” He later cashed in on these connections to establish his career in business. And for a while, this helped him enormously. But networks cannot do it all; Parsons later became chairman and CEO of Time Warner and oversaw perhaps the most disastrous business deal of all time when Time Warner merged with AOL. His story serves as a reminder that connections can only do so much; to have a lasting legacy, leaders must also have business savvy and a good deal of luck.

While Nelson Rockefeller—the scion of an oil family that used connections and wealth to conquer both business and politics—is the kind of person we usually think of as a powerful leader, leaders like Richard Parsons—an African American from a poor family who moved from law into big business—are certainly more common today than they once were in the highest ranks of the elite network.1 The network of senior leaders is still exclusive, but it allows for fresh blood. The way to enter is through connections—like Parsons' connection to Rockefeller and (as I describe in the introduction) Donna Shalala's connections that got her into the White House.

If relational networks were essential in my gaining access to these prominent leaders, they are even more so for the people who live and operate in this realm. Those in society's upper reaches use their connections to secure influence and garner status. Many of the offices I went into were lined with photos of the leader playing golf with the president or shaking hands with a foreign head of state. Interview responses were littered with references to other elite leaders, sometimes because they were necessary to convey the story, and sometimes simply (I assume) so that I would be impressed.

While this name-dropping can become excessive, the truth is that an elite network is necessary for leaders to get anything done, and aspiring leaders must recognize this fact. A strong network serves to tighten the bonds of a leader's own ranks and selectively escorts others into the upper echelon. To gain access, rising stars seek out opportunities to interact with respected leaders. They find ways to build connections and use novel touches (like handwritten notes) to differentiate themselves from the pack. This understanding of the connections between relationship building and influence may seem Machiavellian at first blush, and some successful leaders do rely more upon the spur of ambition than the nudge of social graces to get things done. But in the real upper reaches of power, a leader must not be too pushy or self-promoting—the top tiers of society still resist the overbearing aspirants.

That said, leaders cannot be passive, either. If they overlook the value of a wide-ranging network of acquaintances, they will neither find the opportunities nor gain the relational resources to achieve significant goals and make names for themselves. Not only this, but certain individuals serve as entry points into highly selective networks, and these individuals must be, to an extent, pursued.

Nelson Rockefeller (not to mention family members John and David) is an example of a network superstar, a leader whose influence and reach extends across multiple sectors and generations of leaders. These superstars have a unique ability to draw people together—what I call “convening power,” in that they are able to use their wide networks to unite disparate people who would otherwise have no point of connection. Other network superstars who were mentioned repeatedly by leaders during the interviews include Jack Welch and Warren Buffett.

Ted Turner's office is a testament to his networking versatility. He has a wall filled with his 44 honorary doctorates, his office showcases five Emmys and an Oscar, and a World Series trophy sits prominently on his coffee table. Indeed, many of the people profiled in this book can claim great accomplishments in multiple areas of society. With each accomplishment comes access to a wider, and so more powerful, network.

At the same time, one does not need to have connections to the White House or a network superstar in order to leverage connections effectively. Sometimes the most helpful contacts are internal to a particular organization. One nonprofit executive told me that when she would hire “smarty-pants McKinsey people,” as she put it, she would sit them down and tell them where the power really lies:

Networks are even more important when leaders have to get things accomplished outside of their own firms or fields. One university president shared with me a conflict he had with a politician who was looking to cut state education funding. The president “was able to unleash enough firepower among major [political] players” in the state to avoid the budget cut. He credited his fire power to the loose set of acquaintances as well as loyal friends that he had established through a variety of formal and informal ties. Networks are powerful forces in the stratosphere of society—not only because of whom they include but also what they can do.

As the networks of people in the upper reaches overlap, they form a complex matrix of power involving individuals, institutions, and organizational fields that ultimately reaches across the country and around the globe. It is through this matrix that decisions of national and international consequence are made, elite newcomers are assimilated, and resources of all kinds—economic, political, social, and cultural—are distributed. In essence, this matrix is how power operates in our society. So how do people get attached to these golden webs?

Mentor Relationships

One of the main ways that newcomers become integrated into the matrix of power is through mentoring chains. These are lineages of relationships, rarely recognized formally, that link emerging or potential leaders with already established ones. For mentors, these networks give them the opportunity to gain leverage over the future by investing in their own legacies through the people who will ultimately interpret them. These chains also help build up leadership capabilities within their own organization. For young leaders, mentoring is one of the best ways to acclimate to a new network of social peers, gaining social capital as they...