
Stupid History
Description
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A treasury of historical hilarity from the New York Times-bestselling coauthor of America's Dumbest Criminals!
Why exactly is Paul Revere revered when it was Samuel Prescott who made the famous ride? Was the lightbulb really Thomas Edison's bright idea? Bestselling author and former Saturday Night Live writer Leland Gregory employs his masterful wit to expose historical myths, faux "facts," strange events, and tales of human stupidity throughout history. You'll learn that:
* Magellan didn't actually make it around the world
* As a member of Parliament, Isaac Newton spoke only once, and it wasn't exactly a statement of political brilliance for the ages
* On April 24, 1898, Spain declared war on the U.S., thus starting the Spanish-American War-and then the U.S. declared war the very next day, but not wanting to be outdone, had the date on the declaration changed from April 25 to April 21
With these and many more stories, Leland Gregory once again highlights the funny side of history.
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Content
- Intro
- Half Title Page
- Title Page
- Copyright
- Why is Paul Revere Revered?
- The Myth of Magellan
- Taking a Whack at the Truth
- Benjamin Franklin didn't Discover Electricity? What a Shock!
- Return to Sender-Address Unknown
- By any Means Necessary
- The Color is Plane Wrong
- The Lightbulb was not Edison's Bright Idea
- Captains cannot Tie Knots
- The Evening Star is a Stand-In
- Real Steamboat Inventor Steamed
- The Great Wall of China is Out of Sight
- One Half of All Marriages End in Divorce
- His Name Wasn't Schicklgruber, Either
- The Truth of William Tell Told
- Ladies and Gentlemen, the Beetles!
- Stop Clowning Around
- Bringing Down the House
- There's a Hole in the Bottom of the Sea
- Oh, Hell, Caesar
- Not a Barrel of Laughs
- Sticking His Neck Out
- King for a Day
- A Real Shoe-In
- Bunker or Just Bunk?
- Nuclear Arms Wrestling
- Bridge over Troubled Water
- Who are we Having for Dinner?
- Random Acts of Kindness
- War is Hell
- The Emperor's New Chair
- Foaming at the Mouth
- Survey Says.
- Floundering for a Name
- Two for One
- An Eggstraordinary Story
- Birds of a Feather
- The First Bump in the Road
- The Mass of Men.
- The Late Winner
- As Good As Gold
- You've Got Mail!
- Up, Up, and Away in My Beautiful Balloon
- In a Class by Itself
- Come Fly with me
- Canvassing History
- Two Kings, Three Queens, and a Big Joker
- A Sticky Situation
- You're not in Kansas Anymore
- Please Tread Lightly
- It's a Small World After All
- Nuts to You!
- The Domino Effect
- What a Stupid Beep, Beep, Beep
- Descent of the Scent
- Seldom is Heard these Discouraging Words
- Really up a Tree
- Testing One, Two,.
- Not with a Wimper, but with a Bang
- Stop your Whining
- The Defendants Suck!
- The Incredible, Regrettable Egg
- A Chili Reception
- The Sheep were Rammed
- The Mayflower: Stem to Stern
- Rock and a Hard Place
- Down the Tube
- A Feather in his Cap
- He said, she said
- A Revolutionary Item Up for Sale
- New World, Old Lie
- Bending the Amendment
- It isn't Made of Cheese, Either
- W. C. Fields Forever
- Exit, Stage Left!
- Structured Chaos
- Holy Santa Maria!
- A Close Shave
- Cue the Crying Indian!
- Like a Rolling Stone
- Roses on your Piano
- Sitting in Judgment of yourself
- Roll it
- A Close Call
- Don't want no Fancy Funeral, Just One Like Old King Tut
- A Twist of Lemming
- Sax and Violins
- It's a Dog's Life
- Covering Up the Past
- Alone Again, Naturally
- Ship Faced
- Petite Defeat
- Going Postal
- The Big Bus Fuss
- Speakin' Lincoln
- A Penny for your Thoughts
- You must have the Wrong Address
- Horsing around with History
- Not in High Cotton
- Buckle Up
- Keeping an Eye Out
- The Case of Coke
- It's What's for Supper
- Piercing the President
- Get a Tan by Standing in the English Rain
- Cast the First Stone
- Scooping it Up
- Get Out of Jail Free
- Vote, and Vote Often
- Bailing Out on War
- A Fork in the Family Tree
- The Winner of the "What was he Thinking?" Award
- Life Imitates Art Imitates Life
- All Aboard the SS Guppy
- Dropping a Load
- Bizarre Book Titles
- A Healthy Constitution
- Telegraphic Liar
- Wagons, Ho!
- A Wolf in Sleak Clothing
- A Space All your Own
- Now We'll have Dick Nixon to Kick Around Again
- Dead on Target
- More Bizarre Books
- Casting a Wide Internet
- Nun but the Brave
- History in the Making
- Precooked Fish
- Still More Bizarre Book Titles
- All the News That's Fit to Print
- Getting Down to Brass Tacks
- First in Our Hearts, Maybe.
- A Pachyderm of Lies
- A Token of their Appreciation
- Holmes is where the Heart is
- I've Heard of Ham-Fisted Before, But .
- Just Wing it
- Jiminy Cricket, that's a Big Grasshopper
- Really in the Rough
- Cutting off your Circulation
- X-ing Out Christmas
- Heavy is the Head that wears the Crown
- If we took the Bones Out, It wouldn't be Crunchy
- Deadly Gases found on Uranus
- Line, Please!
- In Sickness and in Health-for Richer or for Poorer
- Are the Noises in My Head Bothering you?
- How much are the One-Cent Stamps?
- One more Time from the Top
- A Cramped Expression
- Pennies from Heaven
- Stop Calling me a Weenie Dog!
- Colonel Bat Guano. if that is your Real Name
- Lincoln's Résumé
- This is My Good Friend, Harvey
- Animal Sounds
- Raggin' on Wagons
- When Walter met Elizabeth
- But, Dad, Everybody's Wearing them
- Pressing his Luck
- Fun with Racist Stereotypes
- More Fun with Racist Stereotypes
- Rain Forest Go Away, Come Again Some Other Day
- The Final Edition of Bizarre Book Titles
- The Spirits of the Republic
- Our Way or Ye Olde Highway
- Caesar or Seize him?
- An Unusual Stock Exchange
- Where's the Lock Box?
- The Circle of Lies
- Cherries Jubilee
- Shhhh, Don't Tell Anybody we're here
- Drats, Foiled Again!
- How much was the Bill of Rights-and who paid it?
- The Number you are Trying to Reach is No Longer in Service
- Shaking Things Up
- Citizen Cane
- Don't be such a Chicken
- Here I come to Save the Day!
- Quotable Misquotes
- Quicker than a Grindstone
- Daisy, Daisy, Give me your Answer Do
- The Retriever of Zenda
- A Unique Groundbreaking Experiment
- Knocking Over a Stonewall
- The Pride of Idaho
- Indians with No Reservations
- The Reflecting Pool
- A Shot at Legal History
- A Highly Charged Article
- Starved for Attention
- Man cannot Live by Bread Alone
- Or is It a Repocracy?
- Can't keep a Good Man Down
- More Quotable Misquotes
- In Case of Emergency, Break Glass
- Nothing up My Sleeve, Nothing in My Head
- Digging for Research
- A Very Queer Relationship
- East is East and West is West
- He was Still a Brave Soul
- So What's your Act Called? The Aristocats!
- Old Flames Burn the Brightest
- Wrong Place at the Wrong Time-Three Times Running
- No, I'm Talking About the Kind that Holds Back Water
- A Grain of Truth
- Presidential Poundage
- Springtime for Hitler
- Dogs of War
- I Only Get it for the Articles Anyway
- A Voyage of Titanic Proportions
- He was a Dick from the Very Start
- No Return-No Deposit
- Not the Boys in the Hood-But the Boys Under the Hood
- You Say Tomato and I Say. Tomato
- When the Chips are Down
- How Do You Know he's a King? He hasn't Got Sh*t All Over Him
- The Department of Redundancy Department
- Live from the Pasta Farms, this has been Al Dente
- It's not just a Good Book-It's a Great Book!
- Because they Don't know the Words
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