Superparenting!
Boost Your Therapeutic Parenting Through Ten Transformative Steps
Published on 21. July 2021
224 pages
978-1-78450-357-4 (ISBN)
Description
Tried nagging, shouting, taking away screen time, but with no success?
Dr Amber Elliott explains why children who have experienced early trauma need something different - therapeutic parenting - a kind of everyday 'superparenting' which champions empathy over punishment.
Trying to parent children who have trauma-triggered behaviours is tough, and none of us are perfect. Taking this as a starting point, Dr Elliott provides you with a ten-step process to transform your parenting. From developing self-acceptance and ideas for building motivation through to creative ways to think about structure and routine, the book combines principles with practical advice and exercises you can try out at home.
Working together, you and your child can discover the secrets of superparenting and overcome trauma-triggered behaviours!
Dr Amber Elliott explains why children who have experienced early trauma need something different - therapeutic parenting - a kind of everyday 'superparenting' which champions empathy over punishment.
Trying to parent children who have trauma-triggered behaviours is tough, and none of us are perfect. Taking this as a starting point, Dr Elliott provides you with a ten-step process to transform your parenting. From developing self-acceptance and ideas for building motivation through to creative ways to think about structure and routine, the book combines principles with practical advice and exercises you can try out at home.
Working together, you and your child can discover the secrets of superparenting and overcome trauma-triggered behaviours!
More details
Edition
Digital original
Language
English
Place of publication
London
United Kingdom
Target group
College/higher education
Professional and scholarly
Edition type
Digital original
Illustrations
43 B&W figures
File size
3,04 MB
ISBN-13
978-1-78450-357-4 (9781784503574)
Copyright in bibliographic data and cover images is held by Nielsen Book Services Limited or by the publishers or by their respective licensors: all rights reserved.
Schweitzer Classification
Other editions
Additional editions
Book
07/2021
Jessica Kingsley Publishers
€19.00
Shipment within 15-20 days
Persons
Dr. Amber Elliott is a clinical psychologist and consultant DDP practitioner. She runs a Social Enterprise called The Child Psychology Service CIC www.thechildpsychologyservice.co.uk. She lives in Staffordshire, UK.
Content
- Intro
- Superparenting!
- Cover
- Also by Dr Amber Elliott
- Title Page
- Copyright
- Contents
- Foreword by Sally Donovan
- Note from the Author
- How to use this book
- A nuts and bolts checklist for superparenting
- Acknowledgements
- Introduction
- What is reward-punishment thinking?
- Where do reward-punishment (traditional parenting) strategies come from?
- Why do we need an alternative?
- Neurological evidence
- Toxic stress
- Executive functions
- Shame
- Emotional regulation
- How we really make decisions
- What is superparenting?
- What is Empathic Behaviour Management (EBM)?
- Approaches and techniques
- The importance of language
- 1. Parental Self-Acceptance
- Introduction
- The Tortoise and the Hare
- The destructive potential of 'shoulds'
- Post-hoc rationalizations: when shame leads to false justification
- What is it that makes our Hare system unhelpful and not therapeutic?
- What are we aiming for?
- Reality: the exhausted Hare
- Traditional: self-discipline (reward-punishment)
- Therapeutic: self-acceptance (EBM)
- Let's get practical
- 2. Safe Containment
- Introduction
- Boundaries in traditional reward-punishment parenting
- Boundaries as safe containment
- Reality: the exhausted Hare
- Traditional: boundaries (reward-punishment)
- Therapeutic: safe containment (EBM)
- Let's get practical
- 3. Celebration
- Introduction
- Praise in reward-punishment thinking
- What do we mean by celebration?
- Reality: the exhausted Hare
- Traditional: praise (reward-punishment)
- Therapeutic: celebration (EBM)
- Let's get practical
- 4. Sharing Difficult Feelings
- Introduction
- Examples of reassurance
- Reassurance in relation to reward-punishment thinking
- Beyond reassurance.
- What do we mean by sharing difficult feelings?
- What can I do when I've got nothing left?
- Reality: the exhausted Hare
- Traditional: reassurance (reward-punishment)
- Therapeutic: sharing difficult feelings (EBM)
- Let's get practical
- 5. Responsiveness
- Introduction
- Consistency in reward-punishment thinking
- What do we mean by responsiveness?
- Reality: the exhausted Hare
- Traditional: consistency (reward-punishment)
- Therapeutic: responsivity (EBM)
- Let's get practical
- 6. Exploring 'Why?'
- Introduction
- Evaluation in reward--punishment thinking
- What do we mean by exploring 'why?'?
- Reality: the exhausted Hare
- Traditional: evaluation (reward-punishment)
- Therapeutic: exploring 'why?' (EBM)
- Let's get practical
- 7. Behavioural Change vs. Emotional Acceptance
- Introduction
- Behavioural change in reward-punishment thinking
- How reward-punishment thinking can discourage children's real insight into 'why?'
- What do we mean by emotional acceptance?
- Reality: the exhausted Hare
- Traditional: behavioural change (reward-punishment)
- Therapeutic: emotional acceptance (EBM)
- Let's get practical
- 8. 'Filling Up' or Accepting Dependency Needs
- Introduction
- What do we mean by 'weaning off'?
- What do we mean by 'filling up'?
- Reality: the exhausted Hare
- Traditional: 'weaning off' dependency (reward-punishment)
- Therapeutic: 'filling up' dependency needs (EBM)
- Let's get practical
- 9. Building Motivation and Hope
- Introduction
- Exploration of rewards
- Reality: the exhausted Hare
- Traditional: rewards (reward-punishment)
- Therapeutic: building motivation and hope (EBM)
- Let's get practical
- 10. Structure and Routine
- Introduction
- Structure and routine in traditional reward-punishment parenting
- Structure and routine in EBM
- Reality: the exhausted Hare
- Traditional: structure and routine (behavioural containment)
- Therapeutic: structure and routine (safety and emotional containment)
- Let's get practical
- Conclusion
- Glossary
- Endnotes
- Index
