
Please Fire Me:
Description
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Inspired by the hugely popular website, Please Fire Me is
"A venting ground for the malemployed." --Thrillist
"A really funny, bitchy co-worker." --The L Magazine
Read hilarious workplace horror stories and follow the PFM guide to surviving the corporate machine.
"Your boss is illiterate, your co-worker eats her own hair--whine it all out on Please Fire Me."--Details.com
"Read Please Fire Me and be happy your job isn't that bad." --Smart Pretty and Awkward
"Hilarious." --Times & Transcript
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Content
- Intro
- Praise for PleaseFireMe.com
- Title Page
- Dedication
- Table of Contents
- Preamble to the Revolution
- CHAPTER 1 Powerpoint the Finger at Them - An informative slideshow to explain your morale is sliding
- Signs You May Be Malemployed
- How to Live with Yourself If You Work for Your Parents
- CHAPTER 2 A Mind Is a Terrible Thing to Copy and Paste - The University of Oxfired offers continued education for the miserable
- Course Catalog
- Continuing Education at Oxfired
- The Rise of the Professionaletarian Class
- How Easily Could You Be Replaced By a Robot?
- Thought Crimes in History
- Oxfired Insists on the Classics: Myth of Bizyphus
- Take Home Brain Teasers
- Advances in Modern Phrenology
- Boss's Language Association Handbook
- CHAPTER 3 Your Work Environment: An Inconvenient Truth - Mapping out the annoyances surrounding you
- An Inconvenient Office Map
- Break Room
- Conference Room
- Cubicles
- Cubicles 2
- Common Area
- CHAPTER 4 Theirs and Yours: Benefits Handbooks - Like comparing apples and golden-parachute apples
- Afluck Budget Insurance
- Other Things Your HMO Doesn't Cover
- Now That's What I Call Annoying! Vol. 43
- Employee Entertainment Center
- Where Do You Stand on the Feeding Chain?
- New Intern FAQ
- Afluck Lordly Insurance Plan
- Things Hopefully Money Can Cure
- CHAPTER 5 Clock-Out! It's Revolution Time! - Glorifying revolutionary heroes like you!
- The Parking Lot Oaths
- The Tall Tale of "Ronny Fireseed"
- Posters for our Posters
- CHAPTER 6 Recruitment - A full report on who to recruit, who to ignore at lunch
- The Smoker's Circle
- CHAPTER 7 Customer-Training Seminar - Flashing the customer with facts
- CHAPTER 8 Prank Your Co-workers! LOL! - Get them good!
- CHAPTER 9 Focus on Your Real Enemy: Bosses - Study the strengths and weaknesses of types of bosses you will encounter
- For Your Eyes Only: Boss Profiles
- CHAPTER 10 The Human Revolutionaries Department - Resolving conflict by creating stupider conflict
- Sexual Harassment
- CHAPTER 11 Women of the Revolution - Bossmopolitan teaches gritty girlies how to screw their entire workplace
- Women Be Shoppin'!
- Old Spice for Women
- Quiz: How Sexist Is Your Office?
- Women Be Shoppin'!
- Bossmopolitan Says . . . The Things That Suck About This Email Are Pretty Simple
- Women Be Shoppin'!
- How To Use Your Body Type as a Weapon
- Revolution Secrets!
- Revolutionary Secrets!
- Shirtless Boss Showdown
- Speak your mind!
- Revolutionary Secrets!
- What Your Boss Really Thinks of Your Hair and Makeup
- CHAPTER 1001010101111 Machines: The forgotten Cog
- Preparing the Human Workforce
- Jobs Neither Man Nor Machine Wants
- Preparing for the Robot Workforce
- CHAPTER 12: Operation: Suck It, Enemies! - Strategic plans to take down your boss
- Operation: Debounce
- Operation: Tongue Twister
- Operation Yuk You
- Operation: The Impregnator's New Clothes
- Operation: Situation Normal, All Backed Up
- Operation: Babyruiners Club
- Operation: One of Those Days
- Operation: Snow Job
- Operation: Mousetrap
- Operation: Frog Her
- Operation: The Thick White Line
- Operation: Blackout Berry
- Conclusion
- Acknowledgments
- Copyright Page
- Notes
System requirements
File format: ePUB
Copy protection: Adobe-DRM (Digital Rights Management)
System requirements:
- Computer (Windows; MacOS X; Linux): Install the free reader Adobe Digital Editions prior to download (see eBook Help).
- Tablet/smartphone (Android; iOS): Install the free app Adobe Digital Editions or the app PocketBook before downloading (see eBook Help).
- E-reader: Bookeen, Kobo, Pocketbook, Sony, Tolino and many more (not Kindle).
The file format ePub works well for novels and non-fiction books – i.e., „flowing” text without complex layout. On an e-reader or smartphone, line and page breaks automatically adjust to fit the small displays.
This eBook uses Adobe-DRM, a „hard” copy protection. If the necessary requirements are not met, unfortunately you will not be able to open the eBook. You will therefore need to prepare your reading hardware before downloading.
Please note: We strongly recommend that you authorise using your personal Adobe ID after installation of any reading software.
For more information, see our ebook Help page.
File format: ePUB
Copy protection: Watermark-DRM (Digital Rights Management)
System requirements:
- Computer (Windows; MacOS X; Linux): Use a reading software that can process the file format ePUB: e.g., Adobe Digital Editions or FBReader – both free (see eBook Help).
- Tablet/Smartphone (Android; iOS): Before downloading, install the free app Adobe Digital Editions (see eBook Help).
- E-reader: Bookeen, Kobo, Pocketbook, Sony, Tolino and many more (not Kindle).
The file format ePUB works well for novels and non-fiction books – i.e., „flowing” text without complex layout. On an e-reader or smartphone, line and page breaks automatically adjust to fit the small displays.
This eBook uses Watermark-DRM, a „soft” copy protection. This means that there are no technical restrictions to prevent illegal distribution. However, there is a personalised watermark embedded in the eBook that can be used to identify the purchaser of the eBook in the event of misuse and to provide evidence for legal purposes.
For more information, see our eBook Help page.