Out of Darkness Into the Light

What happens to those who have experienced early childhood traumas before language has developed? Early childhood traumas can lay dormant for years and awaken when the person meets someone who subconsciously brings darkness to light. What I allowed to happen to me was an unconscious effort to bring past darkness to light. How did I reach such a low emotional bottom line? I realized that my bottom line was that my husband could do anything short of killing me. I left when I knew that I would be killed. We allow ourselves the degree of protection received as a child. Sigmund Freud stated, "I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father's protection." I queried, "Why would an educated woman not think? What was I hiding from myself?" This book began as cathartic writings in search of me, to give voice to that child self, and to make sense out of the senseless. I concluded that my physical body grew into an adult, but my emotional state remained that of my two-year-old self when the trauma happened. Writing was an attempt to break the generational curse in my family. How can I ensure the survival of the next generation if I do not claim my own?