Backpacking with Brian

This is a salutary tale of the 'adventures' of a pair of extremely innocent backpackers (one a debutante in this form of vacational masochism) as they embark on two, climatically very different, trips on the near continent. Seeking shelter each night sometimes in their tiny tent and at other times in accommodation of a very dubious kind (the names of these establishments have been changed to protect the guilty) they set about exploring some of Western Europe's major cities. Their routes take in the delights, and dangers, to be found in, amongst others, -Barcelona, Madrid, Paris, Lisbon, Marseilles, Bordeaux, Amsterdam, Lyon, Salamanca, Geneva etc. You name it, and they had a traumatic 'arthropod-related experience' there. They also managed to be the victims of two robberies in the space of one, extremely uncomfortable, evening and contracted most of the holiday ailments known to modern medicine.... Oh yes, and they had to witness a totally gratuitous display of 'fancy dress nudity' which would have broken lesser men! Were these two 'adherents of the pack' hapless or unlucky in befalling these tribulations? Well, I'm still not sure but I do know that they did survive to tell the tale in all its grimy, in need of a proper wash, detail.