How Not to Die at Secondary School

Starting secondary school is a bit like being dropped into the wilderness... with a timetable, a PE kit you've already lost, and at least one teacher who definitely drinks too much coffee. How Not to Die at Secondary School is a hilarious, brutally honest survival guide for anyone facing the chaos of UK secondary school - from Year 7 newbies to exhausted Year 11s who are still traumatised by cross-country. Inside, you'll discover: How to survive your first day without crying in the toilets The unspoken rules of corridors, lunch queues, and group chats Teachers: the legends, the lunatics, and the ones who live for detentions Friendship drama, glow-ups, glow-downs, and sudden personality changes Homework meltdowns, PE nightmares, and exam-season panic How to stay confident when everything feels awkward and overwhelming Packed with real-life school truths, ridiculous situations, and laugh-out-loud advice, this book helps students feel seen, understood, and far less alone in the madness. It's not just funny - it's quietly reassuring. Because if you're struggling, you're not broken... you're just in secondary school. Perfect for: Students aged 10-16 Children starting Year 7 Parents who want to help without cringing Teachers who secretly know it's all true Whether you're worried about fitting in, surviving lessons, or simply making it through the day without emotional damage, this book proves one important thing: You're not bad at school. School is just weird.