Hanging Out
The Radical Power of Killing Time
Published on 24. January 2023
Book
Hardback
256 pages
978-1-68589-005-6 (ISBN)
Description
"Hide your phone, stop hustling for a second, and read this passionate argument for the importance of unstructured pre-digital hang." —People
Loneliness is an epidemic; it feels harder than ever to connect with others meaningfully. What can we do to remedy this? Sheila Liming has the answer: we need to hang out more.
With the introduction of AI and constant Zoom meetings, our lives have become more fractured, digital and chaotic. Hanging Out: The Radical Power of Killing Time shows us what we have lost to the frenetic pace of digital life and how to get it back.
Combining personal narrative with pungent analyses of books, movies, and TV shows, Sheila Liming shows us how the new social landscape deadens our connections with others — connections that are vital to both self-care and to a vibrant community. Whether drinking with strangers in a distant city or jamming with musician friends in an abandoned Pittsburgh row house, Liming demonstrates that unstructured social time is the key to a freer, happier sense of self.
Hanging Out shows how simple acts of casual connection are the glue that binds us together, and how community is the antidote to the disconnection and isolation that dominates contemporary life.
"The book conceives of hanging out as a way to reclaim time as something other than a raw ingredient to be converted into productivity." —New York Times
“Rich with illuminating stories.” —Slate
"We could all use more of that blissfully unstructured social time, posits Sheila Liming in the well-considered series of arguments found in Hanging Out." —Reader's Digest
"Opens with a simple and expansive account of what hanging out is … Liming dedicates much of the book to stories from her past. She has lived an interesting life, and she tells these stories well.” —Washington Post
"Sharp and vivid writing … a layered exploration of social dynamics that contains some textured literary criticism.” —Bookforum
"More books about hanging out, less about productivity please. Sheila Liming sees the gap in our thinking about time, and the true worth in spending it in an unstructured fashion with members of our community.” —LitHub
Loneliness is an epidemic; it feels harder than ever to connect with others meaningfully. What can we do to remedy this? Sheila Liming has the answer: we need to hang out more.
With the introduction of AI and constant Zoom meetings, our lives have become more fractured, digital and chaotic. Hanging Out: The Radical Power of Killing Time shows us what we have lost to the frenetic pace of digital life and how to get it back.
Combining personal narrative with pungent analyses of books, movies, and TV shows, Sheila Liming shows us how the new social landscape deadens our connections with others — connections that are vital to both self-care and to a vibrant community. Whether drinking with strangers in a distant city or jamming with musician friends in an abandoned Pittsburgh row house, Liming demonstrates that unstructured social time is the key to a freer, happier sense of self.
Hanging Out shows how simple acts of casual connection are the glue that binds us together, and how community is the antidote to the disconnection and isolation that dominates contemporary life.
"The book conceives of hanging out as a way to reclaim time as something other than a raw ingredient to be converted into productivity." —New York Times
“Rich with illuminating stories.” —Slate
"We could all use more of that blissfully unstructured social time, posits Sheila Liming in the well-considered series of arguments found in Hanging Out." —Reader's Digest
"Opens with a simple and expansive account of what hanging out is … Liming dedicates much of the book to stories from her past. She has lived an interesting life, and she tells these stories well.” —Washington Post
"Sharp and vivid writing … a layered exploration of social dynamics that contains some textured literary criticism.” —Bookforum
"More books about hanging out, less about productivity please. Sheila Liming sees the gap in our thinking about time, and the true worth in spending it in an unstructured fashion with members of our community.” —LitHub
More details
Language
English
Place of publication
Brooklyn
United States
Product notice
sewn/stitched
Cloth over boards
Dimensions
Height: 212 mm
Width: 142 mm
Thickness: 24 mm
Weight
370 gr
ISBN-13
978-1-68589-005-6 (9781685890056)
Copyright in bibliographic data and cover images is held by Nielsen Book Services Limited or by the publishers or by their respective licensors: all rights reserved.
Schweitzer Classification
Other editions
Additional editions
E-Book
01/2023
Melville House
€17.49
Available for download
Person
Sheila Liming is an associate professor at Champlain College in Burlington, Vermont, and the author of two previous books, What a Library Means to a Woman and Office. She has been featured in the New York Times Arts & Leisure section as well in periodicals ranging from People magazine to Bookforum and Slate. She has been a guest on the Ezra Klein show and on numerous NPR programs, as well as on KCBS San Francisco and WDET Detroit. Her essays have appeared in venues like The Atlantic, McSweeney’s, Lapham’s Quarterly, The Los Angeles Review of Books, Public Books, and The Point, among others. Hanging Out was the answer to a Jeopardy question on May 16, 2023.
Content
ABLE OF CONTENTS
Ch. 1: Parties
Parties constitute, arguably, the preeminent instance of hanging out. But I think our collective contemporary feeling towards them is a bit mixed and complicated, actually. For instance, I once lived in a town where every single party I attended was an homage to a vision of elsewhere—a place where the party hosts had once lived, where they wished they still lived.
Ch. 2: Jamming
I once played in a band that broke up once a year, every year, on March 18th. Our band played traditional Celtic music and the routinized mayhem of St. Patrick’s Day—our annual high point, from a financial perspective, as we once played 22 gigs in a single week—would regularly drive us to the brink of sanity.
Ch. 3: Hanging Out on TV
Reality television presents a curated, fantasy vision of hanging out. For this reason, many of us count on it to keep us company, to provide a simulated social backdrop to our (somewhat socially deprived) daily lives.
Ch. 4: Hanging Out on the Job
As an academic and writer, my yearly professional calendar is organized by conferences in a way that compares to how those of nineteenth-century New York Social Register-style elites were organized by parties and balls. Or, at least, my calendar used to be organized in this way.
Ch. 5: Hanging Out on the Internet
I’d rather have friends on the internet than have none at all. This was my thought back in 2015, when I joined Twitter, the first and only social media platform I’ve ever used. At the time, I had just moved to North Dakota, where I found myself pressed for friends and social outlets. Hanging out on the internet, I want to argue, is far from ideal but it works, in a pinch.
Ch. 6: Hanging Out with Strangers
In some ways, there is no greater test of one’s ability to get along and simply “hang out” than when is required to do so in the company of strangers. Hanging out with friends is supposed to be effortless; we know that it’s not always that way, of course, but we tend to greet such occasions with more confidence because we already have some inkling of what to expect from friends. But hanging out with strangers is a different situation entirely.
Ch. 7: Hanging Out Under Duress
There are all sorts of scenarios—many of them compelled by professionalism—that necessitate hanging out. As a result, there are all sorts of instances where hanging out happens not by choice but by fiat. This chapter deals with that other, decidedly less pleasant side of hanging out.
Ch. 8: How to Hang Out
This final chapter furnishes a conclusion in the style of a manifesto. Humans, we are repeatedly told, are social animals; thus, to be human is to hang out. So what happens if we forget how? What happens if the combined forces of neoliberalism and the COVID pandemic make it harder and harder to hang out? How do we fight for our rights to effectively do nothing, to “hang out”?
Ch. 1: Parties
Parties constitute, arguably, the preeminent instance of hanging out. But I think our collective contemporary feeling towards them is a bit mixed and complicated, actually. For instance, I once lived in a town where every single party I attended was an homage to a vision of elsewhere—a place where the party hosts had once lived, where they wished they still lived.
Ch. 2: Jamming
I once played in a band that broke up once a year, every year, on March 18th. Our band played traditional Celtic music and the routinized mayhem of St. Patrick’s Day—our annual high point, from a financial perspective, as we once played 22 gigs in a single week—would regularly drive us to the brink of sanity.
Ch. 3: Hanging Out on TV
Reality television presents a curated, fantasy vision of hanging out. For this reason, many of us count on it to keep us company, to provide a simulated social backdrop to our (somewhat socially deprived) daily lives.
Ch. 4: Hanging Out on the Job
As an academic and writer, my yearly professional calendar is organized by conferences in a way that compares to how those of nineteenth-century New York Social Register-style elites were organized by parties and balls. Or, at least, my calendar used to be organized in this way.
Ch. 5: Hanging Out on the Internet
I’d rather have friends on the internet than have none at all. This was my thought back in 2015, when I joined Twitter, the first and only social media platform I’ve ever used. At the time, I had just moved to North Dakota, where I found myself pressed for friends and social outlets. Hanging out on the internet, I want to argue, is far from ideal but it works, in a pinch.
Ch. 6: Hanging Out with Strangers
In some ways, there is no greater test of one’s ability to get along and simply “hang out” than when is required to do so in the company of strangers. Hanging out with friends is supposed to be effortless; we know that it’s not always that way, of course, but we tend to greet such occasions with more confidence because we already have some inkling of what to expect from friends. But hanging out with strangers is a different situation entirely.
Ch. 7: Hanging Out Under Duress
There are all sorts of scenarios—many of them compelled by professionalism—that necessitate hanging out. As a result, there are all sorts of instances where hanging out happens not by choice but by fiat. This chapter deals with that other, decidedly less pleasant side of hanging out.
Ch. 8: How to Hang Out
This final chapter furnishes a conclusion in the style of a manifesto. Humans, we are repeatedly told, are social animals; thus, to be human is to hang out. So what happens if we forget how? What happens if the combined forces of neoliberalism and the COVID pandemic make it harder and harder to hang out? How do we fight for our rights to effectively do nothing, to “hang out”?