Bar/Bat Mitzvah Basics
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Cantor Helen Leneman's specialty is bar/bat mitzvah education. She has worked as a cantor and a b'nai mitzvah teacher in Los Angeles, Baltimore and the greater Washington, DC, area. For several years she chaired the B'nai Mitzvah Educators Network of CAJE. The Network has over 300 members in the U.S. and abroad. She has a BA from UCLA and an MA in Judaic studies from Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion, and studied cantorial liturgy with cantors Allan Michelson (z"l) and William Sharlin. She is the author of Bar/Bat Mitzvah Education: A Sourcebook. She is an associate member of the American Conference of Cantors, and a member of the Society of Biblical Literature. Cantor Leneman directs an outreach program for unaffiliated families who wish to celebrate their children's becoming bar or bat mitzvah. She lives with her family in Rockville, Maryland.
Content
Acknowledgments xiii
Foreword xv
Rabbi Jeffrey K. Salkin
Preface xix
Rabbi Julie Gordon
Introduction xxi
Cantor Helen Leneman
Section I: What's Bar/Bat Mitzvah All About? 1
1 Bar/Bat Mitzvah Basic Elements: Start to Finish 3
Cantor Helen Leneman
2 What Parents Should Know Before the Bar/Bat Mitzvah Ceremony 15
Susie Tatarka
3 "Passing" the Bar (or Bat) Mitzvah: Setting Clear and Realistic Expectations for Everyone 21
Cantor Marshall Portnoy
4 A Guide for the Perplexed Parent: How to Ask the Right Questions about Preparation 33
Cantor Helen Leneman
5 The Parents' Rite of Passage 43
Rabbi Susan B. Stone
6 Ritual Magic and Family Drama: Finding New Meaning in an Old Story 47
Dr. Judith Davis
7 To a Religiously Skeptical Jewish Parent 57
Rabbi Jeffrey K. Salkin
Section II: The Family's Perspective 65
8 Tales from the Home Front: Lessons from Family Experiences 67
Cantor Helen Leneman
9 Reflections of a Mother 77
Missy Cohen Lavintman
10 Reflections of a Father 83
Neal Gendler
11 Post B'nai Mitzvah Thoughts: Teens Reflect 89
Norman Lavintman, Maya Jaffe, Jennifer Greenberg, Miriam White
12 The Bat Mitzvah Dress: An Intergenerational Story 97
Dr. Nechama Liss-Levinson
13 Journey of One Interfaith Family 103
Dr. Donna R. Hart
14 What to Say to Your Child on the Bimah 109
Rabbi Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Section III: Essentials and Options for the Service and the Celebration 119
15 Designing a Creative Service 121
Cantor Helen Leneman
16 Celebrating and Negotiating: Avoiding a Post-Divorce Battle on the Bimah 129
Sally Weber
17 Making the Theme Meaningful 139
Rabbi Aaron Bergman
18 Do You Need a Party Planner? 145
Cantor Helen Leneman
19 Coming of Age: The Significance of Bar/Bat Mitzvah for Interfaith Families 151
Joan C. Hawxhurst
20 Celebrating Bar/Bat Mitzvah Successfully as an Interfaith Family 155
Lena Romanoff
21 Special Needs Children Speak for Themselves 161
Appendix A: On the Learning Path-Selected Resources for Parents 171
Dr. Barbara Wachs (z"l)
Cantor Helen Leneman
Appendix B: Shabbat Morning Service Outline 181
Cantor Marshall Portnoy
Appendix C: Helpful Hints for Parents of Special Needs Children 83
Beverly Weaver
Appendix D: Selected Bibliography: Recommended Sources for English Readings 187
Cantor Helen Leneman
Glossary 189
About the Contributors 193