Playing Pygmalion

Reviews / Votes

With astonishing lucidity and compassion, this insightful and engrossing book is a must-read for people who want to understand how people create their own reality in relationships. In clear, evocative prose, with carefully analyzed case studies, this book demonstrates the dynamic processes by which people construct one another. Therapists will see their patients differently after reading this book-and people will think differently about their own relationships. -- Irvin D. Yalom, M.D. Ruthellen Josselson is able to see and articulate the minute mental moves by which we build our interpersonal world. No psychologist is better at describing how we come to know ourselves in interaction with others and the role we play in both finding and creating people around us. Whether we are considering a lover, a daughter, or a friend, we bring other people and ourselves to life within relationships. In Playing Pygmalion, Josselson extends her important work in identifying the unexpected dimensions of human relationships. -- Terri Apter, Ph.D., author, The Sister Knot The dramatic relational stories, rendered in this book's pages with compassion and wisdom by Josselson, demonstrate that we cannot help but create one another as we struggle with being bound inextricably togetherrrrr -- Jefferson A. Singer * PsycCRITIQUES * Playing Pygmalion is a lucid, timely, and engaging book about the play of unconscious processes in relationships, a book of great value to therapists and clients, and to anyone who is intrigued by the question of how the human mind invents the worldof relationships in which we each take our place. Josselson illuminates how, in our original families and in our current relationships, impressions of others, and others' impressions of us, shape our emotional responses. As she clarifies the psychological processes at work in imagining one another, Josselson creates a window into some of the most puzzling and repetitive aspects of human relationships. She writes of truth in a new register, beyond the accuracy of this or that story about a person, event, or memory, to the emotional truths at stake in the way we invent and reinvent key relationships in our lives. In case after case Josselson shows us how people may be imagined as an answer to our deepest yearnings, or how they might become a cast-off of our own guilt or anxiety. To complicate matters, Josselson shows how their versions of us may harmonize with our own version of self, or not. As we construe and misconstrue one another in our most lasting, intimate relationships, we can compel som -- Annie G. Rogers PhD, associate professor of clinical psychology, Hampshire College; author of The Unsayable: The Hidden Language of Trauma and A Story of Harm and Healing in Psychotherapy Playing Pygmalion is a lucid, timely, and engaging book about the play of unconscious processes in relationships, a book of great value to therapists and clients, and to anyone who is intrigued by the question of how the human mind invents the world of relationships in which we each take our place. Josselson illuminates how, in our original families and in our current relationships, impressions of others, and others' impressions of us, shape our emotional responses. As she clarifies the psychological processes at work in imagining one another, Josselson creates a window into some of the most puzzling and repetitive aspects of human relationships. She writes of truth in a new register, beyond the "accuracy" of this or that story about a person, event, or memory, to the emotional truths at stake in the way we invent and reinvent key relationships in our lives. In case after case Josselson shows us how people may be imagined as an answer to our deepest yearnings, or how they might become a cast-off of our own guilt or anxiety. To complicate matters, Josselson shows how their versions of us may harmonize with our own version of self, or not. As we construe and misconstrue one another in our most lasting, intimate relationships, we can compel someone in the present to live as a ghost of an unacknowledged past. Beyond a careful exploration of the complex, human process of constructing one another, this book challenges us to question deeply held illusions that can undermine love, and ignites a desire to understand one another more fully by seeing what illusions we've imposed, and what irreducible mystery in each human being remains. -- Annie G. Rogers PhD, associate professor of clinical psychology, Hampshire College; author of The Unsayable: The Hidden Language of Trauma and A Story of Harm and Healing in Psychotherapy The dramatic relational stories, rendered in this book's pages with compassion and wisdom by Josselson, demonstrate that we cannot help but create one another as we struggle with being bound inextricably together -- Jefferson A. Singer * PsycCRITIQUES *