When Partners Become Parents

What happens to a couple's relationship when baby makes three? Why do some relationships improve and other falter? Based on a 10 year study of 100 pairs of first-time parents, this book charts the tumultuous changes that greet the arrival of a first child, one of the most common but least understood of life's passages. Drawing on the candid and poignant stories of a wide variety of men and women, the authors reveal common pitfalls and offer sound counsel about navigating the troubled waters of early parenthood. Succeeding as a couple after becoming parents means striking a delicate balance between individual growth and the demands of a family. Anticipating and understanding the strains and stresses can make a crucial difference in how couples fare. The authors conclude that babies are getting an unfair share of the blame for their parents' distress. Among the most troubled couples, the seeds of the problems are sown long before their baby arrives.
Other findings: support groups for expectant couples significantly reduce the the likelihood of divorce; marriages with stay-at-home moms are often less happy; and, despite the best of intentions, the burdens of parenthood are rarely shared equitably. Here is a scientific basis for making one of the most important decisions in a couple's life.