Balls!

This is an irreverent, fun-packed spoof, a football annual for adults, and an instant antidote to all those dark winter nights watching your team's latest scoreless bore-draw against the pub eleven from next door. It is for all those insatiable football fans who thought there was no life beyond 'Shoot', 'Match', or 'When Saturday Comes'! Now you can enrich your knowledge of all things football, and more besides, thanks to this rib-tickling mickey-take on the nation's favourite sport. "Balls!" gets to the parts that other books cannot reach, with its topical trivia and scabrous twist on 'the man's game'. It features, other golden balls: Who named their children after the Knights of the Round Table? Which striker invited Rod Stewart to his wedding? Which defender names his pets after the noise they make? Which England ace has a soundproofed room in his house where he performs Oasis cover versions? Is Chinawhite better than MOVIDA? What about Pangaea? This is an exclusive guide to the favourite haunts of our favourite stars - from Nice to Newcastle. It's all guaranteed to make you eat your season ticket.