Mutuality Matters
Family, Faith, and Just Love
Published on 11. November 2003
Book
Paperback/Softback
272 pages
978-0-7425-3155-0 (ISBN)
Description
Married and family life around the world has undergone a revolution in the last several decades: the radical democratization of intimacy in spousal and parent-child relationships. Previous principles of hierarchy, inequality, and duty that defined the relationships between husband, wife, and children have been challenged and often replaced by more fluid bonds of equality, intimacy, emotional self-disclosure, communication, and mutual trust. The key question that has emerged for our times, then, is how exactly do families sustain genuine mutuality, democracy, and strong relationships?
Figuring out good answers to this question is the major theme of this book and the origin of the title Mutuality Matters. Three common strategies for creating just marriages have arisen: political and legal reform, smarter negotiating by women, and new cultural perceptions of marriage. While the authors in this book attend to all three strategies to different degrees, the primary focus is the third strategy: changing our cultural understanding of women and men in marriage. Moreover, to effect genuine cultural change, the authors recognize the need to enlist the help of religion as a key culture-forming element. Mutuality has become a common way for theologians from a variety of perspectives to talk about a more just love, a love that combines affection and justice. But many questions have been left unanswered: What exactly do people believe they have promised when they align themselves with Christian claims about love in their rituals of marriage and partnership? Do Christian views of love include the ideal of justice in marriage? Because accommodation or sacrifice is inevitable in any intimate human community, how can families insure that it will be mutual and just? How is marriage strengthened if justice is added to love at the core of mutuality? What does mutuality mean across time and distance, when participants are parents and children, when fathers are absent, when parents should be honored, or within a violent c
Figuring out good answers to this question is the major theme of this book and the origin of the title Mutuality Matters. Three common strategies for creating just marriages have arisen: political and legal reform, smarter negotiating by women, and new cultural perceptions of marriage. While the authors in this book attend to all three strategies to different degrees, the primary focus is the third strategy: changing our cultural understanding of women and men in marriage. Moreover, to effect genuine cultural change, the authors recognize the need to enlist the help of religion as a key culture-forming element. Mutuality has become a common way for theologians from a variety of perspectives to talk about a more just love, a love that combines affection and justice. But many questions have been left unanswered: What exactly do people believe they have promised when they align themselves with Christian claims about love in their rituals of marriage and partnership? Do Christian views of love include the ideal of justice in marriage? Because accommodation or sacrifice is inevitable in any intimate human community, how can families insure that it will be mutual and just? How is marriage strengthened if justice is added to love at the core of mutuality? What does mutuality mean across time and distance, when participants are parents and children, when fathers are absent, when parents should be honored, or within a violent c
Reviews / Votes
An important collection of essays focused on the challenge facing Christians of the 21st century: re-conceiving Christian love, particularly within families and between intimates, as radically egalitarian. From philosophical and theological defenses of the place of equality in the practice of love to descriptions of concrete practices within families and congregations, these essays are a thoughtful contribution on the side of gender justice to the on-going family values debate. -- Gloria H. Albrecht, University of Detroit Mercy Like good wine and cheese, Herbert Anderson and his colleagues seem to get better with age. Sitting down to this feast of ideas, especially the appetizing concept of mutuality within marriage and family, allows the reader to nibble and sip with curiosity and delight. At the heart of this intellectual menu can be found Anderson's rich imagination, clinical experience and refreshing honesty. The critical ingredients of love, justice, forgiveness, respect, spirituality, and mutuality explored by contributing authors provide the recipe for a text that is not only mutually satisfying, but also one worth preserving. -- Joseph Gillespie, O.P., Parochial Vicar at the Basilica of St. Mary in Minneapolis, and supervisor in the American Association of Marriage and Family Th Finally a book dealing with a major revolution in our country and the world! Old concepts of marriage have given way to more fluid bonds of equality, communication and trust. This book explores issues of the mutuality of love, justice and gender relations in the context of marriage, pastoral ministry and congregational life. Both clergy and family therapists will find this book's wide range of perspectives and timely exploration of infrequently discussed topics helpful in the ongoing dialogue about the changing shape of marriage and family in the 21st century. -- William Hiebert, STM, executive director of Marriage and Family Counseling Service, Rock Island, IL and co-author of Pre- and Re-marital Counseling This collection of essays is noteworthy for both this interdisciplinary scope and its richly ecumenical representation. * Family Therapy * This excellent pastoral collection is a tremendous resource for rebutting conservative arguments and alarms that pervade the media, and for moving mutuality from an academic value into mainstream Christian concerns by examining the experience of real familes. -- Christine E. GudorfMore details
Language
English
Place of publication
United States
Publishing group
Bloomsbury Publishing Plc
Target group
Professional and scholarly
College/higher education
Dimensions
Height: 229 mm
Width: 152 mm
Thickness: 16 mm
Weight
440 gr
ISBN-13
978-0-7425-3155-0 (9780742531550)
Copyright in bibliographic data and cover images is held by Nielsen Book Services Limited or by the publishers or by their respective licensors: all rights reserved.
Schweitzer Classification
Persons
Edward Foley is Professor of Liturgy and Music at Catholic Theological Union and the founding director of the Ecumenical D.Min. Program. Among his many publications is Mighty Stories, Dangerous Rituals (1998), which he co-authored with Herbert Anderson. Herbert Anderson is an ordained Lutheran minister, professor emeritus of pastoral theology at Catholic Theological Union, and Canon of the Episcopal Cathedral in Seattle, Washington. He is the author of numerous books and articles, many of which are cited throughout this volume written in his honor. Bonnie Miller-McLemore is professor of pastoral theology and counseling at Vanderbilt University Divinity School. Ordained in the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) she is the mother of three boys. Her publications include Also a Mother: Work and Family as Theological Dilemma (1994), Feminist and Womanist Pastoral Theology (1999), and the co-authored From Culture Wars to Common Ground: Religion and the American Family Debate (1997). Robert Schreiter is the Vatican II Professor of Theology at Catholic Theological Union and conjointly the professor of theology and culture at the University of Nijmegen. Among his many publications are Constructing Local Theologies (1985) and The Ministry of Reconciliation (1998).
Content
Part 1 I. Perspectives on Love and Mutuality
Chapter 2 The Family as a Crucible of Grace: Learning and Living the Language of Love
Chapter 3 Just Love? Marriage and the Question of Justice
Chapter 4 Mutuality, Reason, and Public Policy
Chapter 5 Who submits to Whom? Submission and Mutuality in the Family
Part 6 II. Mutuality Matters in Marriage
Chapter 7 Between Rhetoric and Reality: Women and Men as Equal Partners in Home, Church, and the Marketplace
Chapter 8 Gender Narratives and the Epidemic of Violence in Contemporary Families
Chapter 9 Is Equality Tearing Families Apart?
Chapter 10 Navigating Between Cultures: The Bicultural Family's Lived Realities
Part 11 III. Mutuality Matters in the Family
Chapter 12 Sloppy Mutuality: Just Love for Children and Adults
Chapter 13 Over the River and through the Woods: Maintaining Emotional Presence across Geographical Distance
Chapter 14 Honor Your Father and Your Mother: A New Look at "Family Values"
Chapter 15 In Search of Goodenough Families: Cultural and Religious Perspectives
Part 16 IV. Fostering Mutuality through Ministry
Chapter 17 The Black Churches' Response to Father Absence in the African American Family
Chapter 18 More than a Family Affair: Reflections on Baptizing Children
Chapter 19 Conversion or Nurture: When We Thought the Debate Was Over
Chapter 20 The Congregation as a Healing Community
Chapter 2 The Family as a Crucible of Grace: Learning and Living the Language of Love
Chapter 3 Just Love? Marriage and the Question of Justice
Chapter 4 Mutuality, Reason, and Public Policy
Chapter 5 Who submits to Whom? Submission and Mutuality in the Family
Part 6 II. Mutuality Matters in Marriage
Chapter 7 Between Rhetoric and Reality: Women and Men as Equal Partners in Home, Church, and the Marketplace
Chapter 8 Gender Narratives and the Epidemic of Violence in Contemporary Families
Chapter 9 Is Equality Tearing Families Apart?
Chapter 10 Navigating Between Cultures: The Bicultural Family's Lived Realities
Part 11 III. Mutuality Matters in the Family
Chapter 12 Sloppy Mutuality: Just Love for Children and Adults
Chapter 13 Over the River and through the Woods: Maintaining Emotional Presence across Geographical Distance
Chapter 14 Honor Your Father and Your Mother: A New Look at "Family Values"
Chapter 15 In Search of Goodenough Families: Cultural and Religious Perspectives
Part 16 IV. Fostering Mutuality through Ministry
Chapter 17 The Black Churches' Response to Father Absence in the African American Family
Chapter 18 More than a Family Affair: Reflections on Baptizing Children
Chapter 19 Conversion or Nurture: When We Thought the Debate Was Over
Chapter 20 The Congregation as a Healing Community