I crush up my pills and snort them like dust. They are my sugar. They are the sweetness in the days that have none. They drip through me like tupelo honey. Then they are gone. Then I need more. I always need more.
For all of my life I have needed more.
A precocious literary light, Elizabeth Wurtzel published her groundbreaking memoir of depression, Prozac Nation, at the tender age of twenty-six. A worldwide success, a cultural phenomenon, the book opened doors to a rarefied world about which Elizabeth had only dared to dream during her middle-class upbringing in New York City. But no success could staunch her continuous battle with depression. The terrible truth was that nothing had changed the emptiness inside Elizabeth. Her relationships universally failed; she was fired from every magazine job she held. Indeed, the absence of fulfillment in the wake of success became yet another seemingly insurmountable hurdle.
When her doctor prescribed Ritalin to boost the effects of her antidepression medication, Elizabeth jumped. And the Ritalin worked. And worked. And worked. Within weeks, she was grinding up the pills and snorting them for a greater effect. It reached the point where she couldn't go more than five minutes without a fix. It was Ritalin, and then cocaine, and then more Ritalin. In a harrowing account, Elizabeth Wurtzel contemplates what it means to be in love with something in your blood that takes over your body, becomes the life force within you -- and could ultimately kill you.
More, Now, Again is an astonishing and timely story of a new kind of addiction. But it is also a story of survival. Elizabeth Wurtzel hits rock bottom, gets clean, uses again, and finally gains control over her drug and her life. As honest as a confession and as heartfelt as a prayer, More, Now, Again recounts a courageous fight back to a life worth living.
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Elizabeth Wurtzel is the author of the bestselling books Prozac Nation and Bitch. She graduated from Harvard College, where she received the 1986 Rolling Stone College Journalism Award for essay writing. She was the popular music critic for The New Yorker and New York magazines. Her articles have also appeared in Glamour, Mirabella, Seventeen, and The Oxford American. She lives in New York City.
- Title Page
- Copyright Page
- Dedication Page
- One NUMBERS
- Two BYE BYE LIFE
- Three THIS IS WHAT MY LIFE IS LIKE
- Four FEDERAL EXPRESS
- Five SUPPLY AND DEMAND
- Six YOUR FRIENDS AND NEIGH BORS
- Seven THE KILLER INSIDE ME
- Eight BEEN CAUGHT STEALING
- Nine I GOT NASTY HABITS
- Ten HAPPY BIRTH DAY
- Eleven DO NOT DISTU RB
- Twelve YOU DON'T KNOW ME
- Thirteen IN CASE
- Fourteen AND I DIG MY OWN GRAVE
- Fifteen DID SHE JUMP OR DID SHE FALL
- Sixteen ACUTE CARE
- Seventeen KEEP THE FOCUS ON YOU
- Eighteen THE THRILL IS GONE
- Nineteen CONSEQUENCES
- Twenty DAISIES AND DAFFODILS
- Twenty one MIND PLAYING TRICKS ON ME
- Twenty two TERMINAL UNIQUENESS
- Twenty three I THREW IT ALL AWAY
- Twenty four LOVE IS HARD TO STOP
- Twenty five I LOOKED AWAY
- Twenty six HAVE A HAPPY ENDING
- Twenty seven THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD
- Twenty eight THE POSSIBILITY OF HOME
- Epilogue MORE NOW AGAIN
- About the author
Dewey Decimal Classfication (DDC)