Heroine

Embrace Your Flaws & Own Your Awesome
 
 
BOOKBABY (Verlag)
  • 1. Auflage
  • |
  • erschienen am 31. Juli 2018
  • |
  • 200 Seiten
 
E-Book | ePUB ohne DRM | Systemvoraussetzungen
978-1-947279-53-7 (ISBN)
 
DO YOU FEEL PRESSURE TO BE PERFECT? ARE YOU TIRED OF TRYING TO LIVE UP TO SOCIETY'S UNREALISTIC STANDARDS AND JUST WANT TO FEEL FREE? Women today are hard pressed to have the perfect body, be the perfect wife and the perfect mom. We end up feeling exhausted and never good enough because we aim for perfection that can never be attained. It's time to break the cycle and embrace who we are and the journey we are on. Heroine shines a light on the issues women face today and shares how to find freedom in the flaws. Through this remarkable message of self-love, imperfectly perfect motherhood and even fertility struggles you can learn how to: • Say good-bye to a negative self-image by changing the perception not the image. • Discover the beauty in fully loving yourself (flaws and all!) • Consciously raise strong and con dent children because you yourself walk with passion and purpose. 'The moment I started being real with others the more I felt supported. People didn't judge me but rather responded with their own vulnerability... For the first time in my life I let people see me. I let them see through me, and what they saw wasn't perfect but it was Heroine.' | Blaise Hunter
  • Englisch
  • 7,02 MB
978-1-947279-53-7 (9781947279537)
LEARNING TO FLY AH-HA MOMENT Have you heard of the practice of cutting? It's a form of self-injury. This act involves someone literally making cuts on his or her own body. When you think of cutting, what words come to your mind? Pain? Self-harm? Abuse? You might be wondering what cutting has to do with being a heroine. What if I told you every time we think or speak negatively about ourselves, we are in essence, cutting our own souls? Would you take negative self-image more seriously? I know it's a harsh comparison, but negative self-esteem is a dangerous thing. We have downplayed the seriousness of it. Can you imagine your inner child looking in the mirror with scars and open wounds deep within? Will you consider changing your thoughts, knowing every time you feel fat, ugly, and not good enough, you are an active participant in self-mutilation? It's time we end the self-abuse. We need to put down the "knives" and see ourselves as heroines-brave women. By embracing our flaws and owning our awesome, we truly embody the spirit of Heroine. Low self-esteem followed me like a lost puppy throughout my life. I allowed it to chase me because deep down I believed the lie. I wasn't good enough. I was confident about certain things, but they were eclipsed by the side of me that didn't fully love myself. I knew I was fun, and my smile had the ability to light up a room, but I could still find ten faults for every good thing about myself. Instead of showcasing my strengths, I focused on what I thought were my weaknesses. Over time they consumed my every thought. It reminded me of the Tale of Two Wolves.1 "There are two wolves. One wolf is a wolf of love, peace, joy, harmony, and healing. The other wolf is of evil, hatred, misery, discord, and destruction. The fact is that these two wolves are not in a physical sense but are living inside of all of us. The one that we constantly feed is the one that wins." So, which one of your wolves wins? Do your strengths overcome your perceptions of your weaknesses, or do you believe the lies? Which wolf wins? The answer is the same. "It's the one you feed the most."2 My mom once told me she could pinpoint the exact moment in her childhood when her low self-esteem set in. She began the battle when a teacher told her to stop singing in her school choir, and instead she should just mouth the words. From that moment on, she felt like she had a terrible singing voice. Her confidence was shot. The instructor should have offered a word of encouragement or coached her on how to improve her voice. Instead, my mom experienced a completely different takeaway: her voice shouldn't be heard. I think many of us can relate. Most women can identify a time when someone-usually a person in a position of authority in our lives-either encouraged or discouraged our abilities, pursuits, or simply who we were. Single moments of time in which we were either lifted up or torn down have had a major impact on how we feel about ourselves. These seemingly little pinpricks-self-confidence kickers-can happen in subtle ways, but generally we don't give them much thought until later in life. Growing up, I never once believed or said I had bad self-esteem. It took having a child to open the door to reflection. I could no longer turn a blind eye to the "cutting." In 2016, in an effort to improve my physical health, I started a journey of self-discovery. I never imagined the crazy, amazing, painful thoughts and feelings I would experience and the things I would learn about myself. During this time, I stumbled across a Facebook post written by a lady from Australia who was promoting a Netflix documentary she was making. The film, by Taryn Brumfitt, was called Embrace3. It focuses on embracing your body, as is. Just watching the trailer for the film inspired me. I wanted to renew my attention on self-esteem, to learn to love myself and my body as it was, not as I wished it could be. Something switched in me that day. My thinking embarked on a transformation. I thought, "My little girl is perfect exactly the way she is. I would never want her to look in the mirror and think anything other than she is beautiful." I suddenly realized what I was doing. If her mom, her role model, looks in the mirror and thinks, "Man, am I chubby today," or, "Blaise, you have gained weight," or, "That's it. I'm only having water all day today," what hope do our future generations have? How can we expect our children to grow up strong and confident if their mothers don't practice what they preach? I had an "ah-ha" moment as I realized it all starts with me. My voice will become her inner voice. As I watched the documentary Embrace, I was shocked to learn all the ways I negatively think and talk about myself on a daily basis. I had been cutting my soul my entire life. We don't realize in all of those tiny moments, we do one of two things-we either uplift ourselves, or we poison our minds, bodies, and spirits with toxic thoughts and words. I wish I could click my red heels together three times and make your negative thought life vanish in an instant, but I cannot. You have to do the hard work yourself. So, I challenge you to start a journal specifically related to your self-image. Don't get overwhelmed by this. Start with just one day. For that day only, record your responses when someone compliments you. Record what you say about food-to yourself or others. Record what you think about yourself when you look in the mirror. What are you thinking? I was blown away by the number of times I put myself down, even slight or inadvertent put-downs, or made jokes at my own expense. When I began to add up all of those moments, I realized they weren't insignificant thoughts anymore. Instead, my whole day was being consumed with negative self-talk. I fed the abuse. For example, when someone complimented me on how I looked, I said, "Oh thanks, I feel like I've gained weight." I felt uncomfortable when I got a compliment because I didn't feel pretty. I looked at other women in bikinis and thought, "Wow, she has an amazing body. I don't have that." I didn't even want to hang out with those girls because my mind would scream with self-doubt and insecurities. Before I had a kid, I had the time to do Zumba®three times a week. My love for Zumba® motivated me to work hard to get into shape. The upbeat Latin music, the friends I met, and the encouragement from the instructor all helped me to stay motivated. I ended up going to Cuba during that time and wore my bikini on the beach. Though I wasn't particularly self-conscious, I never really liked my body or embraced it for what it was. Fast forward a couple of years, when someone started a fad on Facebook challenging women to post five pictures of occasions they felt beautiful. That one social media trend forever changed me. I posted a couple of selfies of times I was all dolled up. I had taken each one at that perfect angle-you know, where you look ten pounds skinnier. I posted a picture of me when I gave birth, and I posted the bikini pic of me in Cuba. I was fascinated by this picture taken in Cuba because first, I had a six pack, and secondly, why in the heck did I not realize I had a rocking body? Why did it take three years later to grasp how amazing I looked? As I really studied the photo of my hot, sexy body, I realized it had been taken at a time in my life when I was an emotional mess. I remember bawling to my friend daily on that trip in Cuba because I was so stressed and overwhelmed with my life. I posted that pic on Facebook and couldn't believe the responses. To everyone else, it was a stunning portrait. To me, the image was far from beautiful. That whole thing felt like a sham. It was a front because I was hiding all of the negative clutter deep inside. I couldn't allow my true beauty to shine, nor could I appreciate the outside beauty for what it was. The picture was a revelation-another "ah-ha" moment. No matter how much weight we lose or how fit we become, most of us are never completely happy with how we look. There are always more ways to improve. We always seem to find another flaw to focus on. We dedicate so much time and energy to improving our looks, and yet we still find fault with ourselves. How often do we look in the mirror and say, "I'm breathtaking today!"? Now, some of you reading this might think that this whole negative self-image thing doesn't apply to you. You have great self-esteem. You walk with confidence. If you do, it is truly amazing, but I am asking you to be completely honest with yourself here. If you had to describe what you look like in the mirror-completely naked, to a blind person, what would you say? Would you even be comfortable looking at yourself without clothes and masks? Would you describe your flaws? Would you be able to illustrate your inner as well as your outer beauty? Not many of us can do that-not at first, anyway. I've done some deep work to be able to leave the house with no makeup and embrace my authentic face. It does...

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